Hottiesclub

Fun-liners, the most complete selection of over 2000 one-liners!

This is a comprehensive assortment of all one-liners, which is at the bottom of every page. If you know a witticism that is not in the collection, send it to me. Thank you!

1. “Failure is like fertilizer: of course it smells, unfortunately over time it makes everything grow faster.” - Denis waitley2. "My priority is to thank my parents for somehow instilling in me a confidence out of proportion to my beauty and ability." - Tina fey3. “The mind never becomes a difficult task. Thinking is a difficult problem to solve." - Narendra modi4. “One great and glorious day, the viewers of the earth will finally fulfill the desire of their hearts and a complete idiot will decorate an honest house.” - H. L. Mencken5. "I left the order to wake up at any time during a state of emergency in the country, even if i am at a cabinet meeting." - Ronald reagan6. “Never doubt the courage of the french. They specifically discovered that snails are edible.” - Doug larson7. "I refuse to answer this question because i don't know the answer." - Douglas adams8. "Facebook will be a burden, in my time looking at photos of people's vacations was considered a punishment." - Betty white9. "The united states is a country of laws: poorly written and haphazardly applied." - Frank zappa10. “Home is just a place to store your things while you go shopping for modern gadgets.” - George carlin11. "The greatest thief our world has ever spawned is procrastination, and it's still at large." - Josh billings12. “The world needs more geniuses with humility; we are so lacking." - Oscar levant13. “A government that robs peter to pay paul can count on paul’s support at any moment.” - George bernard shaw14. "Advertising is about convincing people to spend a budget they don't have on the fact that pussies shouldn't." - Will rogers15. “The darkest time is always before dawn. In this regard, if the player wants to steal a newspaper from a neighbor, it's time to spend like that. - Navjot singh sidhu16. “Our dilemma is we hate change and love it at the same time; meanwhile, we want everything to remain the same as before, but to get better.” - Sydney j. Harris17. “Originality is a great art of remembering everything you hear, but forgetting, with us you heard it.” - Lawrence j. Peter18. "It doesn't matter if you win or lose, it matters if i win or lose!" - Steven weinberg19. “Most people work hard enough not to get fired and take enough money not to get fired.” - George carlin20. "Opportunity dances with those who are then on the dance floor." - H. Jackson brown jr21. “Laughing at your own mistakes can prolong the life of any person. Laughing at strangers can shorten it." - Cullen hightower22. "By experience we recognize that we never learn anything from experience." - George bernard shaw23. “To err is human, to admit it is superhuman.” - Doug larson24. "I've always wanted to come to switzerland to enjoy what the army does with our tiny red knives." - Billy connolly25. “Inflation is when you pay fifteen greens for a ten dollar haircut, then you created for ten dollars if you personally had hair.” - Sam ewing26. "If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out." - Lawrence ferlinghetti27. "Why so many months left in the completion of the money?" - John barrymore28. “I learned from my mistakes and i am sure that i can repeat them completely.” - Peter cook29. “Education is learning about a situation that the user didn’t even think about.” - Daniel j. Boorstin30. “Do the right thing. The above will make someone happy, and surprise others. - Mark twain31. "If the flight recorder doesn't get damaged in the slightest in a plane crash, why isn't the entire plane made out of this material?" - George carlin32. "Arguing with a man who has given up the use of reason is like giving medicine to the dead." - Thomas paine33. “Everyone laughs the same way in all languages, because laughter is a universal connection.” - Yakov smirnov34. "The path to the heights of success is littered with many enticing parking spaces." - Will rogers35. "The duty of a patriot is to defend his own country from the government." - Edward abbey36. "Whoever laughs last doesn't get the joke." - Charles de gaulle37. "The best thing over time is the fact that it comes one day." - Abraham lincoln38. “When i raced through space, one thought constantly came to my head - every part of this rocket was installed at the best price.” - John glenn39. "If it's hard for you to neigh on your own, i'll be happy to do it for you." - Groucho marx40."For the hotties.club first twelve months of our children's existence, we teach them to walk and talk, and for the next twelve months we tell them to sit down and shut up." - Phyllis diller41. "Worrying is like paying off a debt that you don't owe." - Mark twain42. "A day without laughter is a wasted day." - Charlie chaplin43. “Have you ever noticed that anyone who wants to go slower than you is an idiot, and someone who goes faster than you is a maniac?” - George carlin44. “Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is like expecting a bull to not attack a figure because you are a vegetarian.” - Dennis hooley45. My fear of moving around the entrance is getting stronger.46. The trouble with troubleshooting is contained in the fact that the problem comes back again.47. Do you know that iceland is one of them, in some sea from ireland?48. Where there is a will, in that place is a relative.49. In order not to tear down my christmas lights, i turn my apartment into an italian restaurant50. My three favorite things: eat my family and never use commas.51. Every novel is a detective novel if it is not finished first.52. My friends tell me that cooking is easy, however, this case is no easier than not cooking.53. Hedgehogs, huh? Why can't films just split the hedging?54. If you think that eggplant is healthy, try any other food; this is much better.55. I'm on a whiskey diet. I already lost 3 days.56. Don't pronounce the part backwards. It's a trap.57. If the player doesn't pay their exorcist, will you be confiscated?58. Communist jokes are not funny if everyone doesn't know the files yet.59. Well, in order to be honest with the players, i'll have to change my name.60. Individuals who use selfie sticks really need to look at themselves well, for a long time.61. The trouble with kleptomaniacs is that consultants always take everything literally.62. For golf, as for me, balls are needed in abundance.63. When life gives you melons, you may have dyslexia.64. I don't trust stairs. Employees are constantly plotting at some point.65. I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but i stumbled one day!66. Two guys come to the bar, the third ducks down.67. I used to build my amazing buildings in the calendar factory, but i got fired because i took a couple of days off.68. Why did the old man fall into the well? Because the person could not see well.69. I love telling jokes to my dad. Sometimes he laughs.70. My boss wished me a good day. With that said, i went home.71. I sleep so well that i can sleep blindly.72. This cemetery looks crowded. People have to die to get there.73. Five out of four people admit that they are bad with fractions.74. I would avoid sushi if i were you. This is somewhat suspicious.75. I don't play football because i like yachting. I just do it for fun.76. Maybe february march? Not however april may.77. Right there i came up with the last word: plagiarism.78. In france, there was an explosion at a cheese factory. Bree is everywhere.79. I'm definitely not calling for funerals that start before noon. I guess i'm not a mourning person at all.80. If two vegans fight, does it count as beef?81. A lot of people are shocked when they find out what a bad electrician i am.82. This is my stepladder. I never knew my real ladder.83. I have all the price list i will ever need if i die before 3:00 pm. This afternoon.84. Why does a person believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check if you say the paint is wet?85. In life it is not necessary to stand firmly with both feet on the ground. It becomes difficult for you to put on your pants.86. Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. Therefore study hard and be wicked.87. The most convenient way to add insult to injury is to sign someone's cast.88. If happiness is not available at the set price, why do they sell happy meals?89. We have enough youth. What about the fountain of wisdom?90. Kindle a fire for a man, and the risk will warm up only for one day. Set a man on fire and he will be warm forever.91. Give a man a fish and the visitors feed him for the feast. Teach a man how to fish and you saved your fish.92. Life is like a bird. It's very cute as long as it doesn't poop on your head.93. Money speaks. But all i say is goodbye.94. I don't have a beer belly. I have reservations for my hard abs.95. "The secret of happiness is to fight." - John burroughs96. "Camping is nature's way of boosting the motel business." - Dave barry97. "In fine weather, prepare for a foul." - Thomas fuller98. "There is no rage in hell like a despised bureaucrat." - Milton friedman99. “Anxiety, despite all the efforts made, does not deprive tomorrow of its sadness, it only deprives this day of its joy.”- Leo buscaglia100. "You can always hear that the length of time changes things, but in reality you have to change them yourself." - Andy warhol101. “The most effective way to achieve a goal is to make a purchase.” - Amelia earhart102. "If you can't feed a hundred people, feed at least one." - Mother teresa103. “In the new millennium, it has one advantage over all the rest - it is our own.” - Charles caleb colton104. "Life is just a thought." - Sara tisdale105. “We stop being happy when we want to be happier.” - Walter savage landor106. "Most of all i like to drink wine that belongs to others." - Diogenes107. "Every failure is a step towards a dizzying rise." - William whewell108. "What the world is really going to need is more love and less paperwork." - Pearl bailey109. "The secret of government is not how washington operates, but where it needs to be stopped." - Pj o'rourke110. "In politics, stupidity is not a hindrance." - Napoleon bonaparte111. “The doors we open and close on a daily basis determine our consciousness.” - Flora whittemore112. "The world is a stage, but the play is badly played." - Oscar wilde113. "If you put off all things so long until you believe in some moment, right, you will surely never agree, do nothing." - Win borden114. "No one can leave it and start all over again, but anyone is able to start the present and start a new ending." - Maria robinson115. A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant one follows public opinion.116. Live because you're going to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were destined to abide forever.117. "A real comrade will by no means stand in everyone's way, in a situation where you do not go to the bottom." - Arnold h. Glasgow118. “If users make friends with themselves, you will definitely not be alone.” - Maxwell maltz119. To wish to be someone else is to waste the person you are recognized as.120. “The greatest obstacle to success is the fear of failure.” - Sven goran ericsson121. Life's disappointments are more difficult to endure if a person does not understand a single swear word.122. "I am easily content with the most rational." - Winston churchill123. "Courage is discovering the fact that you may not win - and trying when you know you may lose." - Tom krause124. “To love and win is pretty much the best. Loving and losing is the next best." - William makepeace thackeray125. Make a firm decision now. You can always change it afterwards.126. When all else fails, lower your standards.127. A person is incapable of being late until you arrive.128. Common sense comes from skill, and any of that comes from bad judgment.129. Time is by no means wasted if you always waste it.130. I fought the lawn and the lawn won.131. I don't mind the rat race, but the cheese is needed.132. Never buy a rolex watch from someone who is out of breath.133. No longer confuse an open mind with an empty one.134. The number of people watching the visitors is proportional to the stupidity of your action.135. Life is not about holding good cards, but about playing a bad hand well.136. The main problem with mental notes is that the ink fades quickly.137. "If a man is unable to defeat them, arrange for them to be beaten." - George carlin138. Money can't buy happiness, but it can pick up this movie in a lot more places.139. "You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because roses have thorns." - Abraham lincoln140. If you are what you eat, then i am a corpse.141. In life you have two options: put up with them or die thinking about it.142. My mind is like concrete, thoroughly mixed and firmly fixed.143. "We cannot put off life until we are happy." - José ortega y gasset144. "I've wanted to be alone all ages, but i had to be more specific." - Lily tomlin145. You cannot take responsibility for the latter, in a situation where you are busy experiencing the failures of the past.146. "Some things are so unexpected that no one is ready for them." - Leo rosten147. "In a whole year you will weigh more or less than you do now." - Phil mcgraw148. "We never lost a game, we didn't have enough time, frankly." - Vince lombardi149. "Send your packages early so the post office doesn't lose them by christmas." - Johnny carson150. "Santa claus has the right idea - to visit people only once a year." - Victor borge151. “The less you talk, the more you are listened to.” - Pauline phillips152. I used to get lost in the shuffle, but now i just shuffle with the loser.153. Never put off until later what you can completely forget.154. Practice led to harmony.155.I am so old that in the situation when i graduated from school, history was called its own affairs.156. Everyone believes in heredity until their offspring act like fools.157. "Sometimes you're a bug, and sometimes you're a windshield." - Steven tyler158. There is nothing wrong with the younger generation that has not been cured for twenty years or so.159. "Nostalgia is a piece of equipment that removes ruts and potholes from memory lane." - Doug larson160. "The only time success comes before the job is in the dictionary." - Harvey specter161. Happy in a family union is a man who understands every little word that his wife did not say.162. A great way to forget the full list of troubles is to wear tight shoes.163. If things don't go according to plan, perhaps there never was a plan.164. "Work is a necessary evil to be avoided." - Mark twain165. "You have succeeded in life when everything the audience really wants is everything you really need." - Vernon howard166. "To be as happy as possible, the days must be well planned and the nights left to chance." - Minion mclaughlin167. "You'll miss 100% of the shots you don't drink." - Ryan reynolds168. "A suburb is a place where a developer bulldozes trees and then names streets after them." - Bill vaughan169. "Honesty is the best policy when there is money in it." - Mark twain170. "When we ask for advice, we usually look for an accomplice." - Saul bellow171. "Personally, i think our company founded language because of our deep need to complain." - Lily tomlin172. "A lot of what we call management is about making it hard for people to do their jobs." - Peter drucker173. "Good friends, good objects and a sleepy conscience - this is the ideal life." - Mark twain174. Celibacy will not be inherited.175. How many roads must a man walk before he admits that he is lost?176. If we are the fact that we eat, then with me it is easy, prompt and affordable.177. “If winning is not important, then why keep score?” - Vince lombardi178. You are not the ultimate idiot. The right parts are still missing!179. I get a vacuum between my ears, but at least it's more optimal than nothing.180. If there's anything i hate, it's intolerance.181. He who lives by the sword is killed by those who do not receive.182. "A great way to avoid complexity, deal with it." - Robert anthony183. "Youth is stranger than fiction." - Marceline cox184. "Don't take your dog's admiration as a clear indication of how wonderful you are." - Ann landers185. The best way to get rid of a telemarketer is to ask what he's wearing.186. People say to me that i'm childish, but i think they're just stupid.187. Middle age is when you prefer porridge because of the fiber rather than because of the toy.188. It is of great importance to keep cool, by no means frostbite.189. A wife is a person who will insure you in all the troubles that you would not have encountered if you were alone.190. What happens around usually causes dizziness and falls.191. Work is good, but it interferes with my life.192. “The hardest job children face today is learning good manners without seeing them.” - Fred astaire193. Garbage is the fact that we throw it out 3 weeks before a gamer needs it.194. "If opera is entertainment, then falling off a roof is transportation." - Alfred e. Neumann195. “Health insurance is something that makes people feel out of their element.” - Alfred e. Neumann196. When it comes to donations, some people stop at nothing.197. "Don't compromise yourself, you are all you have." - Janis joplin198. If the sum does not leave you happy, you will not be able to like poverty either.199. The qualities of any of the people can be judged by everyone, how he treats people who he does not need.200. “To err is human. Blaming someone else is politics." - Hubert h. Humphrey201. "The fool and his money will soon be elected." - Will rogers202. "Tell me what you need and i'll tell you how to get by without it." - Scott adams203. “The situation is better for those who do their best.” - John wooden204. I never turn my back on my friends, i don't trust them too much.205. “I don’t know what is considered the key to the pinnacle of success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.” - Bill cosby206. There is an impressive difference between good reasons and reasons that sound good.207. You know that you will be about the age when you know that caution is all you have to do.208. "Mistake is quite easily a different way of doing something." - Katherine graham209.Rugby is a game played by gentlemen with oddly shaped balls.210. Infertility is not inherited.211. “Money cannot buy happiness. They also help you look for it in more places.” - Milton berle212. The safest place during an earthquake would be a stationery store.213. The best exercise is to bend down and make someone work upwards.214. How do you think i'll remember your birthday if you don't look older in real life?215. People are more likely to follow in your footsteps than follow your advice.216. “The tragedy of definition is not that the porn bunny ends so easily, but that we wait so passionately in order to start it.” - Terry gary217. "The purpose of being is life with a purpose." - Robert byrne218. If you want something good in yours, in that case you obviously haven't met anyone.219. My ex-wife's other car is a broom.220. It takes less muscle to smile than it does to frown, and even less to completely ignore others.221. “By doing a little bit every day, i gradually let the task overwhelm me.” - Ashley brilliant222. “I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. My priority is to reach it without dying.” - Woody allen223. "A film critic is like a legless man who teaches you how to run." - Channing pollock224. Giving feedback is not the same as trying to use concrete-like mixes.225. I've been tipping waiters all ages, but they don't seem to appreciate my advice anymore.226. If you do something you regret in the morning, sleep until noon.227. "When all of us think the same, no one thinks that much." - Walter lipman228. I wasn't caught dead with a necrophiliac.229. I often thought about my speech, but never about my own silence.230.If i can help you in any way, you are in a worse condition than i thought.231. "When the player fails to get rid of the skeleton in the closet, you better teach him how to dance." - George bernhard shaw232. Hard work is its own reward, but wouldn't it be easier for you to have money?233. "For others it's a six-pack, for me it's a category of support." - Leo durochet234. "To err is human, however, to really mess things up, you need a design committee of bureaucrats." - Henry spencer235. "The nationalist not only does not condemn the atrocities committed by his entire side, but has a remarkable ability not to hear about them at all." - George orwell236. Freedom is the russian right to doubt everything.237. "To be free is nothing; to become free is everything." - Hegel238. "True comrades strike you in the face." - Oscar wilde239. “Some people don't want heights. Not me. I'm afraid of width." - Stephen wright240. “Compassion and tolerance are not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength.” - The dalai lama241. Don't regret the past, just learn from it.242. If you share the problem, then the question will be halved.243. "There are circumstances when you want to hang the entire human race and end the farce." - Mark twain244. "No one can mean winning the jackpot unless they put a few nickels into the machine." - Flip wilson245. I knew it was unlikely that the solution to my problems would be at the bottom of this whiskey bottle, but what mattered was that i tried.246. You are in a serious relationship when both members are wearing sweatpants.247. "Any kid will do any errand for coffee drinkers if you ask him before bed." - Red skelton248. "Medicine for possession: buy an alternative." - Mason cooley249. “The payoff we get from generous actions is not immediately obvious.” - Francesco guicciardini250. The only thing that stands between you and your dreams is insomnia.251. You can march to the beat of another drummer, but you are still in the parade.252. “Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.” - J. Winter smith253. "He who does not trust enough will not be trusted." - Lao tzu254. "There is more to life than increasing its speed." - Mahatma gandhi255. The questions remain the same. The answers are always changing.256. “The more laws and organization are put in place, the more thieves and robbers will become.” - Lao tzu257. “Sometimes even living is an act of courage.” - Seneca258. Until i see, i won't believe. You wouldn't have found out if you didn't believe it.259. "Reality is nothing but a collective conjecture." - Lily tomlin260. A person often meets his fate, which is worth overcoming, by striving, by which he tries to avoid it.261. "Neither higher education, which do not believe so firmly, as in what our company least know." - Michel de montaigne262. Nothing is ever a complete loss; this can always serve as a bad example.263. Nobody has ruined their eyesight by looking at the bright side of something.264. "It's not what you look at that matters, but sometimes what you see." - Henry david thoreau265. "Not to do what we like, but to love what we have to do and that makes life blessed." - Goethe266. “Anxiety does not yet deprive tomorrow of its sadness, it only deprives today of its joy.” - Leo buscaglia267. "All the people in heaven are gone." - Friedrich nietzsche268. "Sometimes i thought about getting married, and then i thought again." - Noel coward269. "You won't be bigger by making others smaller." - Krishna dharma270. "The most effective way to do this is to do this." - Amelia earhart271. Don't let someone who doubts your worth tell you if you're worth enough.272. "Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell and advertise." - Ted turner273. "Mistakes are always forgivable if you have the courage to admit them." - Bruce lee274. “Among the things you can give and keep are a personal word, a smile, and a grateful heart.” - Zig ziglar275. "Get ready to be a newbie every morning." - Meister eckhart276. The fact that there are many sides to a conflict does not mean that both sides have certain advantages.277. “I believe in rules. Of course i believe. If there were no principles, how could the audience violate them? - Leo durochet278. "I used to go jogging, but ice cubes kept falling out of my glass." - David lee roth279. “My mother used to say that greek easter happens later, because then you can buy cheaper.” - Amy sedaris280. "When existing friends start flattering you in the way that you look young, that's a sure sign that you're getting old." - Mark twain281. "Every dogma has its day." - Anthony burgess282. "Every dogma has a unique day." - Anthony burgess283. “Perfection itself is imperfection.” - Vladimir horowitz284. "The ladies didn't want it to be great, they wanted it to stay on wednesday." - Robert a. Heinlein285. If you find a solution and stick to a degree, that solution could be your next problem.286. “He who remembers others is wise. The man who knows himself is enlightened." - Lao tzu287. "For those who know enough is enough, enough will be enough at any moment." - Lao tzu288. A truly wise person is one who draws wisdom from someone else's misfortune.289. "To die is the simplest of unique things that are as easy to make as they are to roll." - Woody allen290. Don't stop to trample the ants when the elephants run in panic.291. The world is really not much worse. It's just that the news coverage is much better.292. "Advertising is the most truthful part of a newspaper." - Thomas jefferson293. Every journalist has a novel, and this is a great state for him.294. “Things will become normal despite our efforts to improve them.” - Will rogers295. "I don't deserve this award, nor do i have arthritis, and i don't deserve it either." - Jack benny296. "I base individual fashion discretion on what doesn't itch." - Gilda radner297. "Something to think about: why don't you ever see a headline like 'psychic wins the lottery'?" - Jay leno298. "Early to rise, early to bed makes a citizen healthy, deployed and dead." - Terry pratchett299. “Don't worry about the end of the world today. In australia, a day later. - Charles schultz300. "Don't take life so seriously son, it's not permanent in any way." - Walt kelly301. "A black cat crossing your path means that the animal is going somewhere." - Groucho marx302. “Your mind is trustworthy enough to believe any story you give it. Choose wisely." - Stephen sadowsky303. "Man is never as dangerous as then, in that case he is fundamentally convinced that he is right." - John perry barlow304. "Humor is the only divine quality to be found in humanity." - Schopenhauer305. "The future always frightens those who cling to the past." - Tim o'reilly306. “Share your own knowledge. It is the way to achieve immortality.” - The dalai lama307. If you are the smartest person in the apartment, look for a room with the smartest people.308. "The moment you follow all the rules you miss out on the most valuable things." - Katharine hepburn309. “The trouble of the world is that the fools are self-confident, and the smart are full of doubts.” - Bertrand russell310. "The root cause of problems is solutions." - Eric sevareid311. "It takes a great deal of knowledge just to understand the extent of one's own ignorance." - Thomas sowell312. "Committees only hurt what they have." - Freeman dyson313. "If a person does not understand where you are going, any road will not lead you needlessly." - Henry kissinger314. "Middle age is when a guy keeps turning off the lights for economic reasons, not romantic ones." - Lillian gordy carter315. "Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves."- Abraham lincoln316. "The better i get to know men, the more i love dogs." - Charles de gaulle317. "Man was created at the end of the working week, when god was tired." - Mark twain318. “Do not lead the site into temptation. Just say where our employees will find it. - Sam levenson319. It's hard to walk up the stairwell of success with your hands in your pockets.320. The best thing about the good old days is something that i didn't leave either good or old.321. That's not the job, whether you win or lose, it's how you lay the blame.322. Regular intake of alcoholic beverages before pregnancy can lead to pregnancy.323. Don't you want your everyday life to become as interesting as you write on facebook?324. Anyone has the right to be stupid. Politicians simply abuse this privilege.325. I was going to fly on a diet next week, but i have a lot of food.326. Karma means that i can sleep peacefully at night, knowing that all people, and i mistreated them, should have done it.327. I thought about becoming a housewife, until i realized that the offspring could be there.328. Your secrets are safe with me because there is a gigantic possibility that i was not listening.329. "Students who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy." - Bob hope330. “I am not trying to describe the future. I'm trying to prevent it." - Ray bradbury331. "Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more malleable." - Mark twain332. "We have to constantly jump off cliffs and develop our wings on the way down." - Kurt vonnegut333. You need to understand a little than not understand a lot.334. It is better to understand a little than not to understand a lot.335. I used to be addicted to soap, but now i'm clean.336. I'm really good at absolutely everything until people see how i do it.337. Monetary units are not the limit, but they help to keep the connection with children.338. If it is impossible without specialists, we have a lot in common.339. Atheists do not solve exponential equations, therefore, but they do not believe in higher powers.340. People joke about the end of the world as if there is no tomorrow.341. A good wife always forgives her husband when she is wrong.342. "Let's live in such a way that when we die, even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark twain343. Under no circumstances trust a dog to be able to watch your food.344. “Truth is the most precious thing to be found here. Let's start saving on it." - Mark twain345. Thought about making a tattoo, but decided to shout “study me!” Wherever i go instead.346. "It's often a pity that noah and his group weren't late." - Mark twain347. Every morning, when i open the front door to leave the state, i tell my dog to stay, and in any person i would like everyone to be the opposite.348. Why waste time when you can make it spin in your favor?349. My wife will say that i can join your gang, but i have to be home by 9.350. Have hope for the future, but probably build a bomb shelter anyway.351. I'm addicted to hockey poke. Congratulations, fortunately i turned around.352. Don't trust atoms, everything is made of them.353. A clean house is a sign of a broken computer.354. The only knowledge that can harm you is the knowledge you don't have.355. I saw an advertisement for burial plots and thought that was the last thing i needed.356. I love jesus, but he wants me, so it's embarrassing.357. Your existence does not get better by chance. The choice is improving.358. I hate it when i run on a treadmill for 30 minutes and look down to see that 4 minutes have passed.359. Jokes about the unemployed are not funny. They are simply missing.360. “I am an old man and have known a lot of troubles, but the vast majority of publications did not exist at all.” - Mark twain361. "Worldviews have no real power except when one is full." - Mark twain362. "Modern man is incapable of feeling comfortable without his own approval." - Mark twain363. Any job is a dream business if you fall asleep in meetings.364. "Usually i need more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech." - Mark twain365. Victims of auto-correction, untie it!366. “Et cetera” in latin means i cannot think of a third example.”367. The reason a dog has so many friends is because it wags its tail but not its tongue.368. Learn from yesterday, live for tonight and hope for tomorrow.369. Why is the date when you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on, called a holiday?370. The optimist believes that our organization is inhabited in a favorable world. The pessimist fears that this may be true.371. I named my dog 6 miles to tell people that i walk 6 miles daily.372. Why do i always buy plants without the will to live?373. Aging gracefully is like the best way to mention that you are slowly looking worse.374.Improve your memory by doing unforgettable things.375. Women spend a lot of minutes thinking about everything that men think than men do.376. The question is not at what age my priority is to retire, but at what income.377. Moses had the first tablet that could be connected to the cloud.378. “The trouble is not that there are a lot of fools, but that the lightning is distributed incorrectly.” - Mark twain379. “I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; i always feel like they didn't say enough." - Mark twain380. Spend some time looking at the stars. It nourishes the soul and enlivens the mind.381. "I wonder how many chameleons made their way onto the ark." - Adam hess382. "A friend tricked me into appearing at wimbledon by telling me it was a men's singles event." - Angela barnes383. !False (this is funny because it's true.)384. "I value truth so highly that i use it sparingly." - Timothy connor385. "The surest sign of the fact that intelligent life exists again in the universe is that it has not consistently tried to reach out to our company." - Bill watterson386. Life is too complicated in the morning.387. I was told that i was gullible, and i believed them.388. A politician is one who shakes hands with you before elections and trusts you after.389. You can visit your past, just don't take your luggage with you.390. Sometimes we all have years when we are at 386 in the world p4.391. Don't prioritize parts of the people who make the buyer only an option.392. Friendship is not to be found, but it is usually found by chance and software fluke.393. There is a certain freedom in that you have nothing to lose.394. Turns out my high school chemistry teacher was right. Alcohol is that question.395. Dracula is a myth created by big garlic.396. “Buy land, they don’t give it in the future.” - Mark twain397. It's hard to run away from your own inner critic, especially when he's unlikely to shut up.398. "It's easier to stay away than to leave." - Mark twain399. Alcohol: the fuel used in the engine of bad decisions.400. "It's not about the dog in the fight, it's about the fight in the dog." - Mark twain401. “I rarely saw an opportunity until the porn bunny stopped being one.” - Mark twain402. “Who would men meet without women? Little, sir, very little." - Mark twain403. "We have an impeccable government that you can buy at a fixed price." - Mark twain404. "The difference between the right word and the practically right word is the difference between lightning and a firefly." - Mark twain405. "Humor is the greatest good of mankind." - Mark twain406. "I can live a month and a half on an excellent compliment." - Mark twain407. "The only possible way to save your health is to have absolutely everything that you don't want, drink what you like not long ago and do what you don't want." - Mark twain408. "Few things are harder to come to terms with than the annoyance of a good example." - Mark twain409. When you throw away your calendars, time flies by.410. "To the guy who stole my antidepressants, i hope you're happy now." - Eddie elfenbein411. Can't say anything nice? Try using obscene gestures.412. "Just want to take a nap because i heard you get to sleep your way to the top." - Aisling bea413. The computer is a mischievous genie. It will give you exactly what you ask for, and not everyone will have what you want.414. Time is the rarest commodity. Manage yours wisely.415. "In 1969, i gave up the fairer sex and alcohol - it was the worst twenty minutes of my life." - George best416. If i got a dollar for any girl who found me unattractive, they would end up finding me attractive.417. “People cannot be afraid of their government. Governments should be afraid of their people." - Alan moore418. Whatever the visitor does, always give exactly %% when not donating blood.419. My life is a continuous alternation of trying to sleep and waking up.420. One of them will be the guy who dies five minutes before we reveal immortality.421. Some dress to impress, some undress to impress.422. If a representative of the stronger sex remembered your eye color after the first date, then most likely you have small breasts.423. Bad choices often turn into good stories.424. An architect's dream is an engineer's nightmare.425. Life is what happens outside of your computer.426. I like you. You remind me of decades when i was young and stupid.427. A game with a child is half a game, half self-defense.428.“Accept that often you are a dove, otherwise you are a statue.” - Dilbert429. “I just guessed about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trifling." - Irwin s. Cobb430. "I feel miserable without you, it's practically something that you're here." - Stephen bishop431. "He made himself and worships his creator." - John bright432. "I never killed humanity, but i read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence darrow433. I'm not being sarcastic, just smart beyond your comprehension.434. I'm really good at everything until mankind discovers how i do it.435. Don't be sorry about your deeds, be sorry about everything that we were caught.436. Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing the phenomenon that you are shit.437. There are wise ones, there are others.438. You call them curse words, i call them sentence enhancers.439. Anyone has the right to be stupid, and you abuse that privilege.440. My boss asked me to start my presentation with a joke. I have attached the pay slips to the first slide.441. Keep rolling your eyes, you might find a brain there.442. I believe that someday i will love someone like the women in the ad love yogurt.443. They say you are what you eat. I don't remember the food being very disappointing.444. I would like to lose weight, but i hate losing weight.445. "I'm not good at advice, can i interest you in a sarcastic comment?" - Chandler bing446. I was going to be expensive, but there were too many other options.447. If you listen carefully, then i don't give a damn here either.448. Solitary preference, under which i play golf, is to pester my wife. She thinks i'm having fun.449. Golf is what you play when you're too out of shape to play softball.450. Judge me by the people i avoid.451. I've gotten myself into this and will be diverted further into it.452. “Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel where it is stored than to everything on which events it is poured.” - Mark twain453. For golf, as for me, you need a lot of balls.454. The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they take everything literally whenever they want.455. Circumcision is popular because jewish girls don't touch anything other than at least a 15% discount.456. The problem is not that obesity runs in your family. It's the fact that nobody works at your house.457. When life gives you melons, you may have dyslexia.458. My drug test came back negative. My dealer will probably have a little explanation.459. "When i was a boy, i lay in my double bed and wondered where my brother was." - Mitch hedberg460. I was going to look for the missing watch, but i couldn't find the time.461. I hate those who put on big words solely in order to look more insightful.462. I wanted to become an astronaut, but my parents told me that only the sky could be the limit.463. None of the men won in the field of miracles “did you notice how something has changed in me?”464. Being an adult is easy to walk around and wonder what you forgot.465. “Life can be a bitch, so at least try not to fall in love with it.” - Richard lewis466. Those who live most pleasantly arrive last.467. The longer you wait in line, the more likely the food is to end up in the wrong line.468. "The one that is seventy percent water and the rest collagen." - Martin mull469. The player is not embarrassed until you try to tickle one of your colleagues, everyone is afraid of being tickled.470. You're not fat, you're just easier to see.471. Whoever said that technology will replace all paper certainly didn't try to wipe his ipad.472. The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer up someone else.473. I didn't realize that 80% of the lyrics were inappropriate until i had to listen to them in the car with the kids.474. “I find television very instructive. Whenever someone turns on the tv, i go to another resting place and read a book.” - Groucho marx475. "People are most often as happy as they think." - Abraham lincoln476. "Logic will take you from a to z, imagination will take you everywhere." - Albert einstein477. “Whenever i feel the need to exercise, i lie down until the porn bunny is gone.” - Paul terry478. “All consumers want is love. But a little bit of chocolate doesn't hurt sometimes." - Charles m. Schultz479. “Better to be hated for who you are than to be loved for who you are not.” - André gide480. “Being yourself in a world that is always trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” - Ralph waldo emerson481. “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Some exist, so all.- Oscar wilde482. “A friend is a person who has come to you all and many still love you.” - Elbert hubbard483. "In three words, i can sum up everything i have guessed about the modern: it continues." - Robert frost484. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who object are not burdened with meaning, and those who are important do not object." - Bernard m. Baruch485. “Two steps are endless: the universe and human stupidity; but i'm not sure about the universe." - Albert einstein486. "Some say i've aged like a good wine, but i just want to get back the 15 years i spent locked up in a vault." - Nick jack pappas487. The same students who made fun of me for my high school calculator watches now wear apple watches.488. "A person who won't read has no superiority over one who can't read." - Mark twain489. “It is better to take what does not belong to a person than to leave this procedure unattended.” - Mark twain490. "Golf is the optimal walk, spoiled." - Mark twain491. A liberal is a conservative who once received a bill from a hospital.492. When prisoners fall in love with each other, do they complete sentences for each other?493. Any joke is a witticism if the notebook in which you write it down is quite wide.494. "One of the mostmost claimed striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives." - Mark twain495. “In cults it makes sense. Do you know how hard it is to make friends as an adult?" - Sofia benois496. I scream in no way, but when i scream, that's it.497. The indian version of how i met your mother lasted only one episode, titled "the wedding".498. If the aliens decide to kidnap me sooner or later, i hope they will do the above - on sunday evening, but not at the end of the week, because i definitely don't want to lose the weekend.499. The possibilities are endless, but i only want the good ones.500. "When in doubt, tell the truth." - Mark twain501. Never invite an arsonist to a housewarming party.502. Here with my wife there is a rule: the person who is driving controls the radio when i do not have a license, and of course she controls the radio.503. "If a cop is ready to tell you to put your hands up, it's always a bad idea to wave them like you're doing anything else." - Nick jack pappas504. "Always make new mistakes." - Esther dyson505. The risk i took was calculated, but damn it, i'm bad at math.506. Friday the 13th is a joy started by big hockey to sell more masks.507. Good morning to everyone, except for the people who call to make sure you get their letter (for example, within half a minute after you receive it).508. One modern man who forgets to take his medicine can really enliven an ordinary working day.509. Let him cast the first magazine without typos.510. Dance is the perpendicular expression of horizontal desire.511. I love defenseless animals, especially in private gravy.512. The nuance that there is a path to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the expected traffic load.513. Stalking is when two people go on a long romantic walk together, but only one of them knows about it.514. Once i farted in an elevator, this restriction was wrong at different levels.515. The one that hesitates is not only lost, but also far from the next exit.516. How long is a chinese name.517. Black humor is like love - not everyone understands it.518. I can quite imagine working in a mirror factory.519. Some are alive only for the reason that it is against the law to shoot in this mode of travel.520. Help a person when he is in a difficult situation, who will remember you when he is brought into trouble again.521. Forgive the enemy, but remember the bastard's name.522.The person who carries the cat by the tail learns what he cannot learn in any other way.523. The audience is just a multiplied "i".524. I didn't attend the funeral, but i sent a nice letter saying i approved of it.525. "Lack of funds is the root of all evil." - Mark twain526. Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing criminal in such a desire, except that it is not true.527. Sometimes we are glad to see more from others, because we are ready to do much more for them.528. Retirement is great. He does nothing without worrying about getting caught.529. For example, i like roman numerals.530. "My name is fin, which means it's almost impossible for me to finish emails without looking pretentious." - Fin taylor531. Don't players hate it when someone answers their own questions? Yes.532. I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner as it only collected dust.533. When i first got the universal remote, i thought, "that changes everything."534.In the eyes of a number of people, throwing acid is wrong.535. “A well-formulated problem is a half-solved problem.” - Charles kettering536. Be a voice, not an echo.537. "I prefer to be vaguely right than exactly wrong." - John maynard keynes538. “Politicians are useful everywhere. They promise to build a bridge even where there is absolutely no river.” - Nikita khrushchev539. “A wise man speaks because he has something to say, a fool speaks because it is useful for him to say something.” - Plato540. “Among the tourists, whoever agrees, says nothing, few are silent.” - Thomas neal541. "Change your fantasies and you will change your world." - Norman vincent peel542. "Modern life begins to end the day we stop talking about important things." - Martin luther king jr.543. "To be considered, and it is not to find everything that you are going to, sometimes it is wonderful luck." - The dalai lama544. "Teach your tongue to say 'i don't know' and we will move forward." - Maimonides545. "There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing and be nothing." - Aristotle546. “Life is 10% of food, what happens to me, and 90% of how i react to it.” - Charles swindoll547. "Every hit gets me closer to the next home run." - Babe ruth548. “Procrastination is her going in time with yesterday.” - Don marquis549. “Sorry, if the audience were right, i would agree with you.” - Robin williams550. "People don't make things the way they are, we observe things the way we are." - Anais nin551. "No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar." - Abraham lincoln552. "Millions saw the apple fall, but newton was the people who asked why." - Bernard baruch553. "Failure is success if we learn from it." - Malcolm forbes554. "An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of sermons." - Mahatma gandhi555. "Be the change you long to have in the world." - Mahatma gandhi556. "Life is full of suffering, loneliness and suffering and it all ends too soon." - Woody allen557. “People say i don’t have willpower, but i have quit smoking many times.” - Kai humphreys558. How do people make new friends? Ask for a friend." - Steve bugeja559. "I used to be addicted to swimming, but i'm very proud of the people, but i haven't drunk that in six years." - Alfie moore560. “Love is like a fart. If you're being forced, it's probably shit." - Steven c. Amos561. "I hate it when i'm about to hug someone very sexy and my face goes down in the mirror." - Bill murray562. "I have nothing to declare except my genius." - Oscar wilde563. "Race is just a pigment of the imagination." - Glen highland564. "An escalator cannot break, it can only become a ladder." - Mitch hedberg565. Generally speaking, you don't learn much when your mouth moves.566. Forget about world peace. Visualize the turn signal.567. Consciousness: that annoying time between sleep.568. Everything is edible, some things can only be eaten once.569. Our site with my girlfriend often laugh about how competitive we are. But i laugh more.570. I wrote a song about tortilla. Well, actually, it's kind of a wrapper.571. Most people cry when they cut onions. The trick is not to organize an emotional connection.572. "Um." - The first horse that was ridden573. "The more things are banned, the more popular they become." - Mark twain574. "There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist." - Mark twain575. When people ask me if i'm dating anyone, i automatically assume they testify to a psychiatrist.576. If you can't explain it with an apple smartphone in simple terms, you can't understand it yourself.577. "I've discovered that the people who hope our organization can live in a computer simulation tend to be the comrades i feel most comfortable simulating in a computer." - Joi ito578. The most interesting information comes from teenagers, because they tell absolutely everything they know and then stop.579. Don't worry guys, my half just turned off the car radio so we wouldn't get lost again.580. We cannot lend a helping hand to everyone, however, everyone helps someone.581. The most dangerous part of the motorcycle is the nut that connects the seat to the handlebar.582. Love is the triumph of imagination over reason.583. She wanted a puppy. But i didn't want a puppy. In connection with which we decided to compromise and got a puppy.584. Feel free to stand up for what you believe in, even if it means standing alone.585. Thank you for explaining the word "a lot" to me, it's very important.586. It's fast a bad day, not a bad life.587. Don't let your worries get the better of you; remember, moses started out as a basket.588.I tried to explain to my 4-year-old son that it's completely normal to accidentally shit in his pants, but he still laughs at me.589. The woman of my dreams has a special combination of inner and outer youth and, most importantly, is too naive to understand that she is far from my league.590. What is the difference between gentlemen and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.591. I asked my north korean friend how in that place, he said he was not in a position to complain.592. All the user needs is ignorance and confidence, and success is guaranteed.593. "A good programmer is a person who always looks both ways before crossing a one-way street." - Doug linder594. The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer up someone else.595. “Don't worry if something goes wrong. If everything worked, you would live without employment. - Mosher's law in software engineering596. When i was younger, i could know what was needed, whether it was bad or bad.597. The nutritional information on a box of cheetos is the same as the dating advice on a box of crocs.598. "Looking at a code you ordered more than two weeks ago is identical to looking at a code you may be seeing for the first time." - Dan hurwitz599. “The next best thing after the latest ideas is getting good suggestions from your users. Sometimes the latter is better." - Eric raymond600. Life doesn't hand me lemons, it shoots them at me quickly with a lemon gun.601. "Every great developer that you know has succeeded by solving problems they weren't qualified to solve until they definitely did it." - Patrick mckenzie602. "The overriding reason for complexity is that software vendors uncritically accept almost any feature that users want." - Niklaus wirth603. "The best programs are written when the programmer has to make money on something else." - Melinda varian604. “The power of javascript is that you can do whatever you want. The weakness is in who you do it." - Reg braithwaite605. The trick to truly enjoying other people's company is not to spend too much time with them.606. “One of the most important programming skills you can ever gain is knowing when to take a short break.” - Oscar godson607. "Debug time increases in proportion to program size." - Chris wenham608. "Programs must remain written for audiences to read them, and only occasionally for machines to execute them." - Harold abelson and gerald jay sussman609. "A language that doesn't affect how you dream about programming isn't worth knowing." - Alan j. Perlis610. "I ran a half marathon" sounds much better than "i quit half a marathon."611. “Think about these things and decide well. In a large-scale company, nothing happens without software. Nothing". - Robert "uncle bob" martin612. "We base our computer sites the same way we build our cities: over time, without a plan, on ruins." - Ellen ullman613. I am trying again to persuade my wife to take part in life together.614. "Debugging is like being a detective in a crime movie where you're quite the killer." - Filipe fortes615. "Good po, like good wine, takes time." - Joel spolsky616. "Exactly what one programmer can do in one month, two programmers can do in a couple of months." - Fred brooks617. I have the possibility of a really scary halloween costume. How do i dress like "peace now"?618. “Conceptually, there is no difference between theory and practice. However, in practice there is one. - Jan l.A. Van de snapschoyt619. "It's all talk until the code works." - Ward cunningham620. The trouble with teaching children to think for themselves is that they may not agree with us.621. Naturally, it sounds bad if you are talking about this fact exactly as it happened.622. For someone who hates the circus, i've dated most clowns.623. In fossils alone, the mind must be carved in stone.624. A healthy person in a high society must appear insane.625. I miss the days when farmville updates were the most offensive thing that could be easily posted on facebook.626. Why are stupid people so sure of themselves?627. I am tired because the representatives of mankind think that i have a good character, then that i am ugly.628. Posting opinions on the world wide web is like catching personalities so that gadgets will tell you how wrong you are.629. The tea party my baby invited me to is more like a hostage situation.630. Time moves exorbitantly like a turtle for any customer?Schedule something that the viewer doesn't want to spend and it will immediately speed up.631.Call me a curmudgeon all you want, but there are over 700 hours of aol's free content on the discs offered.632. Always be yourself. If you cannot be silent, then be so.633. My kids get along great when they sleep.634. I have found that people tend to leave the customer alone as soon as they see you eating mashed potatoes out of your coat pocket.635. I'm not a stalker, i'm a free private investigator.636. If you prefer someone, release him. Then write them 50 times a day, telling them how much you love them and how free they are now.637. “This bag of potato chips is pure chaos! This problem needs to be dealt with!” - Inventor of pringles638 chips. Judge people by each, how they are considered different when they are hungry.639. Relax. It will be much worse.640. Damn are you a magnet? Don't forget that i was attracted to you before you turned around!641. Let me explain easily: my goal is to be invited, but i don't want to go.642. The older i get, the sooner it gets late.643. Sorry i'm late. I was trying to figure out how to get out of this.644. None of my friends laugh at my jokes as cats only know how to meow.645. I only need to be ready to sleep my way to the top, if that really meant sleep.646. Just because i'm smiling doesn't necessarily mean that i like you. Perhaps i imagine you on fire.647. Saying the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results, is called parenting.648. My bed is such a magical place where i suddenly remember everything i need to do.649. Skiing is probably the most expensive way to fall off a mountain.650. I just hired a private detective to keep track of what i do one day.651. I bet in a couple of decades there will be a course in college called visual contact 101.652. Thus, apparently, the answer to the invitation of brides "maybe next time" is not the correct answer.653. 70% of our planet is covered with water, the other 30% is covered with idiots.654. I'm usually attracted to guys who look like i'm going to need therapy after getting to know them.655. Please play with their brother. In fact, thanks to this, we had him.656. I put sexy on dyslexic.657. I told my wife that i wanted children in my free time and she reminded me that we are married and live together, so i will have to see them daily.658. The best thing about work, at the office, is to get if you eventually forget that you had a haircut, someone will definitely point you to that.659. Happy 10th anniversary of your profile picture on our dating site660. I thought reverse psychology was when you bring your therapist to tears.661. I called for roadside assistance, but they didn't want to hear about my problems, unless they were related to my car.662. I'll show you mine if you show me the tequila.663. Relationships become easier if one gourmet is a cake.664. I saved my abstinence for marriage.665. It is useless to remain an open book if you surround yourself with a bunch of illiterates.666. We are all strangers here, many are simply strangers than the rest.667. I am at my best when no one is paying attention to me.668. I bet raccoons look at garbage trucks, but how i look at taco trucks.669. I'm too antisocial to open the door at the right time.670. I can't figure out if the zombie apocalypse has all begun, if the office coffee maker has all broken down.671. My wife had recently threatened to kill me in my sleep, which seemed noticeably less horrific than being killed in real life. She was thoughtful by definition.672. The basic rule to test the theory about everything is that happiness is not sold for a set price.673. Continental breakfasts should be served on tectonic plates.674. I am irish. You don't really speak my language until you start screaming.675. Sometimes i say that i'm an introvert so that films don't expect me to talk to them again.676. If i go missing sooner or later, before calling the police, please check between my bed and the wall.677. I'll clean the house when the last child leaves.678. "Gambling slots: a reliable way to agree, get nothing for it." - Wilson mizner679. Tomorrow is a big day for me. They fill the snack vending machine.680. I can mention that spring is almost here because i am on the verge of committing suicide, but i would also like to plant a few bulbs.681. Twitter taught me that if you don't have anything to say, just say "this.682. A group of owls is called a parliament, which is strange, since owls are very intelligent.683. I meant to stay longer, but i have something trivial.684.Sometimes i would like my conscience to be unconscious.685. I wish i could continue this conversation, but i didn't listen.686. I'm not antisocial, i just don't want to associate with idiots.687. Do not burn twice in a common flame.688. Don't worry about tomorrow's problems, solve today's problems first.689. I don't make mistakes, i make alternative decisions.690. I pre-planned my funeral to include a 32-minute montage of the moments when i casually greeted someone waving at someone behind me.691.The longer i stay at home, the more homeless i look.692. No matter how cool you think you are, there will always be a closed pistachio ready to spoil you.693. I enjoy video games because they allow me to fulfill my most secret fantasies, such as giving a task and then fulfilling it.694. Tomorrow i return to workloads with the childlike confidence that this year people will think at least twice before hitting reply all.695. What is the most unreliable method of communication and how to force relatives to start using it?696. Guilt is the food best served by a mother.697. The best secrets are the ones you share.698. Relationships are the exhausting practice of constantly trying to be more interesting than a smartphone.699. Just because red flags have been popping up all over the place for so long doesn't mean it's not for you personally.700. Dear santa. I realized that i need to explain a lot…701. A sea of liquor cannot intoxicate me as much as a drop of you.702. Don't prioritize things that require a brain.703. She wanted to meet again. I told her i don't water dead flowers.704. I am orange juice and you are toothpaste. May we never meet again in life.705. The only thing i regret in life is that i didn't tell people to go into the torment sooner.706. Looks like i need another drink.707. I'm too smart to be happy.708. Sometimes i am normal, but i get tired quickly so i become myself again.709. Women are like bacon. They smell perfect, are amazing on demand, and are slowly killing you.710. My middle fingers straighten as i think about you.711. I don't do drugs. I am a drug.712. This liqueur tastes like it's my day off tomorrow.713. Good night, friends and enemies! Remember that by this evening you are more likely to die than this morning.714. Do not let your loneliness drive the client into the arms of others.715. I used to be sober. Now i am the author.716. "Life is coolest - with a dirty imagination." - 717. If you can't eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the freezer?718. What could be worse than waking up at a party and finding a penis painted on your face? It turned out that he was tracked.719. Apparently, i snore so loudly that i scare you in the car, then i drive.720. My company and my wife have been happy for twenty years. Then we met.721. I'm quite good at keeping secrets. It's the women that i tell, the fact is they can't.722. If i got a dollar for every girl who found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.723. The reward for a job well done is more work.724. If the bathroom is not flooded, did the children even brush their teeth?725. When you are dead you don't know you are dead. All the pain is felt by others. The same happens when you are stupid.726. Fb memories are the best way to see how fat you are.727. Marriage must take place with a stenographer.728. “I have never been able to explain to the mechanic that i have a problem with the car, not preferring sound effects.” - Donna mccoy729. "Now i'm on three dating sites because there's never enough rejection." - Mark campbell730. “I finally found a woman of long-term perspective. She is very hot, and no one else can see her. - Ray bryant731. I'm sorry for any of the awful things i said to you when you were wrong and needed here.732. "I look at my neighbor through the blinds, he's so creepy." - Jacob swift733. I was worried for 8 hours last night.734. If you love someone, never talk about politics.735. “I agreed with my life partner so much that my head just starts nodding at the sound of her voice.” - Kent graham736. I just want to be rich enough to be called eccentric, but not primitively crazy.737. There is live music playing in the hotel, and my favorite song is "now we're leaving for a break, we'll be back later."738. I want to be something really scary for halloween this year, so i dress up like a phone battery for a couple%.739. "I have a lightsaber next to my bed, if another breaks in one day, i can make them feel sorry for me." - Nick ross740. There is nothing i learned as a father that i could not understand just as easily by burning all your money.741. I feel normal all my life when my doctor says that something is normal for me for my age, but in addition, in my own professional moment, death will also be normal for my age.742. In the current realities, i boycott any company that sells products that i can't afford.743. Why is it so difficult to find an "uncle" who desires me because of a person that i carefully created online who does not represent me at all?744. Worst of all, when you are kidnapped, after the news tells everyone about your real height and weight.745. I like older men because they are used to the disappointments of life.746. My only goal when i'm getting ready for a public outing is to make sure a teenager doesn't take a picture of my outfit to get me a meme.747. My email password was hacked. This is the third time i've had the opportunity to rename a cat.748. "Whenever i think i'm weird, i ride the new york subway." - Harry anten749. I just asked my husband if he remembers now. It's easy to scare men.750. I can solve a rubik's cube in less than a few clicks.751. My wife is fluent in rage.752. Don't talk about my mistakes, let's focus on yours.753. When i said i was afraid of the dentist, i meant the bill.754. The most dangerous side effect of depression is poetry.755. One of the best things about women is that they can tell customers what the visitor really means when you say something.756. Music makes every day better, hotties club especially if you turn on the colors loud enough to drown out everyone around you.757. "When your government only recognizes the human rights of its own people, it's basically the opposite way of pointing out that everyone else's films are inferior to the people." - Amy stepanovich758. I hate when you're out of food when you're still eating.759. Before i say something exciting to my wife, i take both of her hands in mine. So she can't hit me with them.760. A couple of years ago my therapist told me that i was having trouble letting go of the past.761. It is useless to try to neutralize the error. Focus on ready-made.762. My favorite food in this situation would be absolutely everything you ordered.763. When they discover the center of the universe, many will be disappointed that it is not them.764. Of course, i talk to myself, sometimes i need expert advice.765. My people skills are in the form of. I need to work on my tolerance for idiots.766. I don't have gray hair. I have "raisins of wisdom".767. Don't worry about getting old. It doesn't last that.768. I have the heart of a lion and a strict ban from the zoo for life.769. I'm starting to believe i'll never be old enough to know better.770. The world would only be a cleaner place if we gave the blind brooms instead of canes.771. The most difficult thing in dealing with a blind woman is to intelligently convey the voice of her husband.772. No matter how much pressure you put on the envelope, it will still be stationery.773. You have two kinds in everyday life, you can remain lonely and unhappy or marry and wish for death.774. I find it ironic that red, white and blue represent freedom, until they flash behind you.775. Relationships are very similar to algebra. Have you ever looked at your x and wondered y?776. I don't understand how you can agree when i admit that i'm not perfect.777. I judge my day by the number of times i threaten to send my beloved heirs to an orphanage.778. Call me anything but early in the morning.779. “The main goal of a computer scientist is not to get lost in the complexities of his own creation.” - E. W. Dijkstra780. Your soul mate is currently pushing through several other soul mates before they finally get to you.781. Doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results, is not the definition of insanity, but the definition of education.782. 90% of office workers wish not to be arsonists.783. 90% of this vacation is simply that i look at the seagulls over my plate of food.784. Today it turned out that no one can go to the sports complex "without difficulty to see."785. I often think that if i had taken a different route in life, i would be able to lie on a slightly more comfortable sofa now.786. I'm so hungry i can eat a vegetable.787. I hold my resolve.788. My girlfriend said she wants a fabulous life. Wanting to help, i lured her into a vessel in her grandmother's bedroom with a wolf.789. I just want to be completely rich, then to order already assembled furniture.790. Life is too short to help one another decide where to spend it.791.What the user can really learn from marriage advice is that you are not the only person your spouse won't listen to.792. Being a husband is like being a meteorologist. You have the ability to be wrong about 80% of the features and still be in the service.793. Red bull and vodka. Because you are waiting to know this error.794. Unwise to underestimate my overreaction.795. I'm aware that i said you were dead to me, but that move was before i needed to travel to the airport.796. "It's hard to be humble when you're the same great as me." - Muhammad ali797. "Lack of faith requires many to be afraid of getting hardships, and i believed in myself." - Muhammad ali798. "It's not a boast, if you can confirm it." - Muhammad ali799. "I've made my share of mistakes in this search, but if i changed even one life in an optimistic direction, i didn't live in vain." - Muhammad ali800. "If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can definitely make something out of you." - Muhammad ali801. “Age is what you think it is. You are as old as you think." - Muhammad ali802. "Boxing is a mass of white men watching two black men beat each other up." - Muhammad ali803. "If you even dream of beating me, you better wake up and apologize." - Muhammad ali804. “Will is required stronger than skill.” - Muhammad ali805. “It is not the mountains ahead that weary you. It's a pebble in your shoe." - Muhammad ali806. "Silence is golden when you can't think of a good answer." - Muhammad ali807. "Tear like a butterfly, sting like a bee." — Muhammad ali808. "Don't think about the days, count the days." — Muhammad ali809. "The user who observes the world at 60 as well as at 20 has lost 30 years of his life" - muhammad ali810. You will be right." - Muhammad ali811. "What you think, sometimes you become." - Muhammad ali812. "To become a great champion, you must believe that you are the best. If the answer is no, pretend that you are." - Muhammad ali813. "One who is not brave enough to take risks will not achieve anything in life." - Muhammad ali814. "A great way to make your fantasies come true, wake up." - Muhammad ali815. The airline just told my woman that she has an awful lot of luggage and they only understand her for a few minutes.816. If you start spanking people with your wife's handbag 817. My life is an open book. At the same time, it is very disastrously written, and finally i will die.818. 63% of the time spent in as an adult over 40, it's just waiting for the pill to kick in.819.The most responsible life skill i've learned is to stop asking questions.820.No matter how stupid you feel, remember , little red riding hood failed to understand that the talking wolf in the jacket was not her grandmother.821. My son asked made me feel like being a parent, so i woke page up at 3am to let him know that i couldn't sleep.822. It doesn't cost me fun to drink cold.823. None of them have stolen my lunch at the office since i started labeling this time as "stool sample".824. I'd like to have a serious talk with my daughter, but i'm not very good at emoticons.825. Yesterday i changed my diet, choosing a more attractive and depraved diet.826. Mondays are great. Your job sucks.827. I can listen while our employees talk about me.828. Once i brought my own members of the society with me to the firm, and already now my boss has become extremely tolerant of being called my drunkenness.829. If i wasted precious time on all this to be ashamed of my mistakes, i would never do anything else.830. There should be a children's camp for the adult population, where you can just go and sleep for 3 weeks.831. Trust is fundamental in a relationship. You must be absolutely certain that she won't tell your wife.832. Learn from your own mistakes. Make better and better mistakes until you make the best mistakes in the world.833. When the issue reaches to a war of wits, i am no match for the last cookie.834. I dreamed of replacing my nerve endings with a central trust system.835. I'm just guessing i'm doing it all wrong since i don't have a wife to confirm it.836. Sorry ladies, but i've already got my eye on a woman who's not interested.837. When in doubt, just do the opposite of everything a pajama user would do in public.838. Our website and my wife keep track of our expenses. If you believe what ufarozaopt.Ru we see, here it works perfectly.839. I don't understand women at all. They hate you for asking them how long they have lived, but they are always tormented by meeting you if you forget their birthday.840. I just saw a guy with a support dyslexia sticker on the front bumper of his car.841. I'd organize my dreams, but i'm afraid the images will coalesce and claim benefits.842. Let's never discuss this again until i decide to bring it up later.843. A man of few words is usually married.844. I turned off the lights for a couple of hours of ground cover and i've never been honked by so many cars.845. I don't like who i become when i have to get out of bed.846. I'm not ignoring you, i'm being mysterious.847. You never discover that a gambler is over someone until you are in a car and they are on a crosswalk.848. Why would they outweigh all the jurors just because our experts can't understand?849. I said i can make decisions. I didn't say that the decisions i made were of good quality.850. Every time i find the key up the hill, others change the lock.851. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.852. Never speculate on what you can know for sure.853. It's lonely upstairs, but you eat better.854. Old age is always fifteen years older than you.855. Goods moderately, even moderation.856. You have the opportunity to learn from your mistakes, and now you will learn a lot.857. Beneath my rough exterior lies an even rougher interior.858. I saw everything, did everything, i remember almost nothing.859. My conscience is clear - never used.860. Am i ambivalent? Yes, both positive and negative sides.861. My task is patience, and my goal is it right now!862. The bartender is a real pharmacist with limited inventory.863. Confession is good for the soul, but bad for the career.864. Everyone repeats after me: “we are all individuals.”865. All power corrupts. However, absolute power is pretty good.866. Red meat is not bad for customers. Fluffy green meat is bad for you.867. Of course, i want to help the buyer. Which way did you enter?868. Talk is cheap. Until you get a lawyer.869. I've made my decision, don't confuse me with facts.870. Anxious work! 90% of the things i worry about don't happen anymore.871. A bus is a car that travels twice as fast when you are after the spectacle as when you are in it.872. I'm easy with attitude. You have problems with perception.873. Difference between buddies and criminals? Wanted criminals.874. If you have the opportunity to remain calm when chaos reigns around you, then you probably have not yet understood the situation to the final chord.875. Experience is absolutely everything you read, sometimes you don't get what you want.876. Dogs have owners. Cats have a staff.877. I don't have a relationship; i have a temper that a person can't handle.878. Impotence: nature's way of saying "no hard feelings".879. Alcohol is the perfect solvent: it destroys marriages, families, and careers.880. It doesn't matter if you win or lose: it matters if i win or lose.881. The difference between fiction and existing conditions? Fiction must make sense.882. For every action there is an overreaction.883. A celebrity is someone who works hard most of his life, then to be famous, and then wears dark glasses so that the concrete is not recognized.884. Stress is when you wake up screaming and realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.885. Conscience - we offer the fact that it hurts when you the rest of the tail feel so effective.886. Why don't you immerse yourself in all sorts of games that are more convenient... Like coma.887. I said no to drugs, but they just didn't listen to me.888. Alcoholism is the only problem that tries to convince you that you don't have it.889. Prudence is a chance to raise an eyebrow instead of a voice.890. I pretend to work while they pretend to pay me.891. Ham and eggs: a day's income for a chicken and a lifetime commitment for a pig.892. The problem for producing something right without specialists lies in the fact that not a single person understands how difficult it was.893. Men are like ink, usually running at the initial sign of emotion.894. Trust but verify.895. Warning: drinking alcohol can make you think about what you can sing about.896. I would kill for the nobel peace prize.897. I guess, given the above, i'm not married.898. If you stop hoping for santa claus, you will get clothes for christmas.899. If it's really we're here to help others, or what are the others here for?900. A cheap shot is a terrible thing to lose.901.It is difficult to take care of appearance in business.902. How people are called that they are afraid of santa claus? Claustrophobia.903. Time is a great healer, but a terrible beautician.904. Letting the cat out of the bag is no more difficult than putting it back in.905. Now that food has replaced fucking in my life, i can't get into my own pants either.906. Life within is expensive, but it includes free travel around the sun.907. Teach your child to be polite and courteous, and when he grows up, he will not yet be able to leave his car on the freeway.908. I wondered why the frisbee got bigger and it dawned on me.909. Observed relationship status: cooked dinner for two. Ate both.910. I don't know if alcohol will do, but it's worth a try!911. I heard a great joke about amnesia, but i forgot it.912. In high school i was going to join the debate team, but another dissuaded me because of this.913. Don't blame the holidays, you're left fat at the end of summer.914. With wide power come big electricity bills.915. Whoever said funds don't grow on trees has clearly never sold weed.916. Beautiful ladies non-stop call me ugly until they find out how much i earn. Then they call me ugly and poor.917. I believe the japanese flag really shows how afraid they are of godzilla.918. I enter a resting place and trip over my wife's bra. It was a booby trap.919. Apple by date gets rid of the doctor. As well as the lack of health insurance.920. I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept dropping out.921. Drink until the porn bunny is cute, but stop before the wedding.922. The smartest way to lie is to tell the truth, the carefully edited truth.923. "Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died." - Erma bombeck924. "I have enough money to last my whole life if i don't buy something." - Jackie mason925. America is the entire tourism industry, where half of the money is taken away from food, and the other half is also taken away to lose weight.926. "When you go to court, you put your fate in the hands of people who weren't smart enough to get away from jury duty." - Norm crosby927. "The bank is the place to lend you the amount you need when you can prove the buyer doesn't need the details." - Bob hope928. “Most of all, the fastest way to double at the same time as money. In the end is to fold them up and put them back in your pocket.” - Will rogers929.It was love at first sight. Then i took another look.930. Laugh and life will laugh with you. You snore and sleep alone.931. We are all time travelers moving at exactly one hour per hour.932. "Sorry" and "sorry" mean the same fact. Except when you are at a funeral.933. “I don't care about terrorism. I have been married for two years." - Sam kinison934. “I don’t think it’s true at all that only one company makes the monopoly game. - Stephen wright935. If a word is spelled incorrectly in the dictionary, how will people know about this fact?936. Two mistakes are just the beginning.937. Bacteria is the only culture some people have.938. I live in a healthy little world, but nothing catastrophic, they know me here.939. Take my advice; i don't use pussy anyway.940. My favorite mythical creature? Honest politician.941. Any lady can be wrong, but only a fool convicts the resource of this.942. “A man who drinks whiskey with owls at night cannot soar with eagles the next day.” - Brian d. Ratty943. "I'd rather be someone else's whiskey than everyone's cup of tea." - Carrie bradshaw944. Whiskey is liquid sunlight. - George bernard shaw945. “There really is a good person who knows how to help solve the “writer's block”. His name is mr. Johnny walker." - Ashwin sangi946. "Even though i can't run on water, i can definitely swing on whiskey." - Ashwin sangi947. “Whiskey, like a beautiful woman, demands recognition. First you look, and then it's time to drink. - Haruki murakami948. "The tools i need for my work are paper, tobacco, food and some whisky." - William faulkner949. “Ninety% i will spend on good times, beautiful ladies and irish whiskey. The other ten percent i'll probably waste." - Tug mcgraw950. “I like whisky. Always loved, and as a result i never drink such a bear. - Robert e. Lee951. “I used to love whiskey. But i haven't left drunk for a long time." - Claude williams952. "Always carry a jug of whiskey with you for a snakebite and, in addition, always carry a small snake with you." - W. C. Fields953. "How he from anxiety works better than whiskey." - Ralph waldo emerson954. "I shouldn't have switched from scotch to martinis." - Humphrey bogart955. Never drink whiskey without water, never drink water without whiskey.956."There are no bad whiskeys, just some are better than others." - William faulkner957. "You must always be ahead of life, even if only for one serving of whiskey." - Humphrey bogart958. "Quite a lot of bad stuff, but too much good whiskey is just about enough." - Mark twain959. “There are 2 rules for drinking whiskey: first of all, no more drinking whiskey without water, and secondly, never drink water without whiskey.” - Charles murray960. There is no such thing as a big whiskey.961. "Whiskey is by far the most massive of the list of remedies that do not cure the common cold." - Jerry weil962. "Free advice costs money." - Robert half963. "I won't eat oysters, my goal is for my food to be dead...Not sick...Not injured...Dead." - Woody allen964. “Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone out of the blue.” - John stewart965. "I like what the mechanics wear... The whole thing." - Stuart francis966. “Zimushka is a method by which nature declares: - take your own!” — Robert byrne967. "If you can find an aussie indoors, it's likely he'll have a glass in his hand." - Jonathan aitken968. "I intend to open this country to democracy, and anyone who is against it, i will send to prison." - Joao baptista de oliveira figueiredo969. "My parents didn't want to move to florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." - Jerry seinfeld970. “You will remain a redneck if there are no curtains in a particular house, however, there are such in your truck.” - Jeff foxworthy971. “If it’s so good outside, why are all the bugs trying to get into my home?” - Jim gaffigan972. Any paint, regardless of level or medium, if accidentally applied, is worth a permanent hold on any surface, prepared or otherwise.973. "Glass drive-in containers were designed to allow most cars today to welcome their original owners." - E. Joseph kossman974. "By the time the patient is wise enough to look under his feet, he is already too old to go anywhere." - Confucius975. Never trust anything until the whole thing is foreseen officially refuted.976. "I got more benefit from alcohol than alcohol took from me." - Winston churchill977. “A minibar in a hotel allows you to look into the future and read what a can of pepsi is worth this year.” - Rich hall978. If flattery isn't required, try bribery.979. There is no food evidence that life is serious.980. My opinion belongs to my missus and she says that i was lucky with him.981. Any small object, when dropped, will hide under a large object.982. Hey, i may have alzheimer's, but at least i don't have alzheimer's!983. The chances that some are following users is proportional to the stupidity of your action.984. Communism doesn't work because people like to own things.985. Trust god, but tie your camel.986.Everyone has a mission in life. Yours is probably watching tv.987. Wisdom is the comb that is given to a man when he is bald.988. I wasn't able to remember how to throw the boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.989. Stable relationships for horses.990. Winter is the season in which people do everything to make the apartment as warm as in summer, when they complained about the heat.991. Your worst humiliation is only someone's fleeting amusement.992. Just say a firm no to negativity.993. “Stop worrying about the end of the world today. Australia tomorrow." - Charles monroe schultz994. "The most common way people avoid their power is to think they don't have it." - Alice walker995. "Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise." - Victor hugo996. “Absolutely everything that irritates us in others can lead clients to understand themselves.” - Carl gustav jung997. "Our employees are all in a ditch, but certain customers are looking up to the stars." - Oscar wilde998. "You never stop being too old to bet on another goal or think of a new dream." - C. S. Lewis999. “I learned that courage is not the absence of fear, but the victory over it.” - Nelson mandela1000. "I think it's better to feel great, in which cases you can apply to look." - Tom hanks1001. “Nothing is impossible, the very word says: “i am possible.” - Audrey hepburn1002. "Trying is the essential step to failure." - Homer simpson1003. "War is god's way of teaching geography to americans." - Ambrose biers1004. “Age is a serious problem of mind over matter. If you don't re-read it, it doesn't matter." - Mark twain1005. "An english country gentleman galloping after a fox is something inexpressible in pursuit of the inedible." - Oscar wilde1006. “I have kleptomania. But when it's already bad, i take something from it. - Ken dodd1007.“I saw this show “50 tools to develop before you die”. I would think the obvious one is "cry for help." - Jimmy carr1008. “I don’t like country music, but i don’t want to denigrate those who love it. Besides, for those who like country music, denigrate means "to suppress". - Bob newhart1009. "Chopsticks are one of the reasons the chinese never made custard." - Spike milligan1010. “My wife sent her photo to the lonely hearts club. They sent her back saying they weren't too lonely." - Les dawson1011. I always treat life circumstances with distrust. Plus a slice of lemon and a shot of tequila.1012. Isn't it strange that if a policeman drives by, you feel paranoid but unprotected?1013. Cake: detailed advice for each question.1014. The most magnificent make-up of a woman is passion. And for example, it is easier to buy cosmetics.1015. All troubles pale before a hangover.1016. My therapist says i'm preoccupied with revenge. We will look at the processing.1017. Never marry a woman who was the captain of a debate team.1018. It takes patience to enjoy. It takes skill to pretend to be listening.1019. I suppose if i die and go straight to hell, it will take me at least weeks to realize that i am no longer on duty.1020. Time - we offer something that prevents events from happening simultaneously.1021. Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the food, that the other person was born an idiot.1022. A liberal is only a conservative who has not yet been robbed.1023. Intelligence is like underwear. It is necessary that you have it, but not always that you flaunt it.1024. Escalators don't break. They just look like stairs.1025. "Marriage is the main reason for divorce." - Groucho marx1026. Strong citizens do not humiliate others. They pick them up and hit the light for maximum damage.1027. I like birthdays, but i think that too much can kill you.1028. There are never bugs in my software. It just develops random features.1029. I don't have a solution, but i admire the problem.1030. Do not use a large word instead of a diminutive.1031. A lot of people stop looking for work when they are looking for a job.1032. The only substitute for good manners is quick reflexes.1033. One who thinks logically provides a healthy contrast to the real world.1034. You won't weigh more than your refrigerator.1035. Opportunities always seem to be more than they are placed.1036. Middle age is when the breadth of the mind and the narrowness of the waist change places.1037. A balanced diet is a cookie in any hand.1038. No husband has ever been shot while washing dishes.1039. I drive just to worry about my cholesterol.1040. In a situation where you look like a passport photo, you probably need a trip.1041. How is civil war possible?1042. If those who give up don't win at anything and leaders never give up, then what fool coined the phrase "get out while you're ahead"?1043. If practice leads to excellence and no one is perfect, why practice?1044. Don't judge a book by a movie.1045. Give in to temptation; he knows how not to avoid looking at you.1046. Going to bed early, getting up early is suspicious.1047.Check that the toilet is working before you really need it.1048. The path to the house of friends is never long.1049. "When the well runs dry, we know the value of water." - Ben franklin1050. If the tablet gives you a headache, do what the aspirin bottle says: take two and keep as far away from teenagers as possible.1051. "The older i get, the smarter my dad gets." - Mark twain1052. "He who does not hope to win has already lost." - Simon bolivar1053. Enthusiasm can be like a fire that one day needs to be poked with a stick.1054. If you let go of the past, it no longer threatens to possess you.1055. A person who feels that the partner is too small to change any detail has never been bitten by a mosquito.1056. “When the power of love overcomes the attachment to power, then the world will know peace.” - Jimi hendrix1057. Why is the space you are driving in a boulevard and the place you park here is a roadway?1058. "With a monetary crisis, only two steps are bad: too much or too little." - Charles bukowski1059. If the client is doing a job very well, you will be stuck on it.1060. “At any party there are 2 kinds of people: those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is the fact that people are usually married to each other." - Ann landers1061. “You see, the mystery is that god gives males a brain and a penis, and there is just enough blood to flow only through.” - Robin williams1062.They keep saying the right person will come, i know mine got hit by a truck.1063. "Skill is that amazing thing that allows the wearer to recognize a mistake after you make it again." - Franklin p. Jones1064. "Sometimes the road that is less walked is not accidentally walked." - Jerry seinfeld1065. "An american citizen will cross an ocean to fight for democracy, but he won't cross a street to vote in a national election." - Bill vaughan1066. "By the time a member of the stronger sex realizes that his father was right, he already has a son who believes that his use is wrong." - Charles wadsworth1067. “I'm at the age where i want two beauties. If i fall asleep, they have someone to talk to.” - Rodney dangerfield1068. I need to exercise early in the morning before my brain realizes what i'm doing.1069. "The necessity the french will get in is if we tell them we found truffles in iraq." - Dennis miller1070. "The big difference between sex for a price and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less." - Brendan behan1071. “Why does a woman work for a couple of years to change a man’s habits, and then complain that he is not the man she married?” - Barbra streisand1072. “By working diligently 8 hours a day, you will eventually be able to become a boss and work twelve hours a day.” - Robert frost1073. “If you die in the washer, be sure to press the up button. - Sam levenson1074. "The only problem in life is why kamikaze pilots wore helmets." - Al mcguire1075. "Women who choose to be equal to men don't quite have the ambition." - Marilyn monroe1076. “Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in those in front.” - Bill mcglashen1077. I've had amnesia for as long as i can remember.1078. Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!1079. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed why he continues to be so popular?1080. Atheism is an unprophetic organization.1081. As far as i remember, i don't remember. - Vincent "jimmy blue eyes" alo1082. Gravity always confuses me.1083. I can put up with the pain as long as the porn bunny doesn't hurt.1084. If you don't like the news, go and file it.1085. Work in order, each of us is used to fishing.1086. The stronger people i meet, the more i like my dog.1087. Do not steal. The government hates competition.1088. It's not hard for me to cover the expenses. They are everywhere.1089. There is nothing reliable for a sufficiently talented fool.1090. "I started again and i still have a huge part of it." - Seasick steve1091. Why is the word "abbreviation" so long?1092. "There are several types of people: those who want to count and those who can't" - warren buffett1093. Consciousness: that annoying time between sleep.1094. "Payments can't buy love, but they improve your negotiating position." - Christopher marlow1095. "If women ruled the world, there would be no wars here, but only intense negotiations every 28 days." - Robin williams1096. Never go to bed angry, stay awake and plot revenge.1097. “The human brain is a wonderful thing. It will start working the moment you are born and never stop until you never get up to perform in front of an audience.” - George jessel1098. "The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter." - Winston churchill1099. Three words are guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere: hold my wallet.1100. “Do you want a friend in washington? Get a dog." - Harry s. Truman1101. I dream of a better future where chickens can cross the road without questioning their motives.1102. Nothing sucks more than that time during an argument when you realize she's wrong.1103.A thousand bucks miles trip starts with a blown fan belt and a flat tire.1104. "It takes an impressive person to cry, but it took an impressive person to make that person laugh." - Jack handy1105. A squeaky wheel is not necessarily lubricated, it is changed periodically.1106. Early to bed, early to rise, and your girlfriend hangs out with other guys.1107. "Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster." - Ken ndaru1108. "I don't have to agree with everything i say." - Marshall mcluhan1109. I bet i can stop gambling.1110. Casual sex is a man's thing, or should i dress up?1111. The politician will defend what, according to the designated opinion, people will lead.1112. "A young girl must fall in love with a bad man once or twice in her life in order to be grateful for a good one." - Mae west1113. The second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.1114.Asking stupid questions is easier than correcting stupid mistakes.1115. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor1116. "Politics is the art of looking for problems, finding them, misdiagnosing them, and then misapplying the wrong remedies." - Groucho marx1117. Constipated people don't care.1118. If you are not the lead dog, the view will never change.1119. There are 2 kinds of visitors that don't talk much: silent and talking a lot.1120. Many of us learn from the mistakes of others; the rest must seem different.1121. “The hardest thing in life is knowing which bridge to cross and which one to burn.” - David russell1122. Archaeologist: one whose career lies in ruins.1123. There are 2 types of friends: people who are nearby when the data is useful to you and those who are nearby if they need you.1124. Everything is edible, some things can only be eaten once.1125. "It's easy to talk about a person's character - you can judge by everyone how the drug treats those who cannot do anything to him." - Goethe1126. "Progress is made by lazy users looking for an easier way to get things done." - Robert a. Heinlein1127. "Cheerfulness may not solve every problem, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort." - Herm albright1128. Health is actually the slowest rate at which a user can die.1129. Life is a bitch, because if it was a whore, it would be easy.1130. If you are willing to learn from your mistakes, why do some users have more than one of your children?1131. Voices are often heard. Some see invisible people. Others simply have no imagination.1132. Hospitality. Make your guests feel at home, even when it's convenient for you.1133. If you think no one cares if you're alive, try skipping a couple of payments.1134. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They need to be changed more often, and for the same reason.1135. “I asked god for a bicycle, but i know that god does not work like that. So i stole the bike and asked for forgiveness.” - Emo philips1136. “Why do they call it rush hour when everything is not moving?” - Robin williams1137. "Any child will perform any task for users if you ask him before bedtime." - Red skelton1138. Diplomacy is letting another get his way.1139. The firmness of the butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread.1140. Being superstitious is a bad omen.1141. Gravity always weighs me down.1142. I used to think how indecisive i was, but now i'm not too sure.1143. On the other hand, you have different fingers.1144. Eat right. Keep like. All the same die.1145. "Man can't get absolutely everything, where would you put it?" - Stephen wright1146. Sometimes i wake up grumpy; in all other situations i let her sleep.1147. Laugh alone and the whole world might say you're an idiot.1148. He who laughs last thinks the slowest.1149. No criminal listens until you never make a mistake.1150. If we should not eat animals, why are they made meat?1151. Few women admit their age; few men act like this.1152. Lottery: a tax on mankind, poorly understanding in mathematics.1153. "People laughed when i said i was going to be a comedian... Well, they don't laugh now." - Bob monkhouse1154. "I quit my job at a helium plant, i refuse to be spoken to in a local tone." - Stuart francis1155. “I live in a family with 2 incomes, but who knows how long my mother can support it.” - Shmuel breban1156. "On the whole, i'd say my photography career has been a little blurry." - Milton jones1157. "If it weren't for pickpockets, i wouldn't have a sexual life at all." - Rodney dangerfield1158. "My buddy doesn't sleep well, but i can sleep by touch." - Shmuel breban1159. "The worst time to have a heart attack is a charade match." - Demetrius martin1160. "I'm not an actor, but i play one on television." - David rexick1161. “I don't smoke, i don't drink, i don't sniff or gamble. Although i'm lying a little." - Tim maya1162. "Dyslexic man peeks in bra." - George carlin1163. “One of the punishments for denying presence in politics is recognized as the one that you generally fall under the power of subordinates. - Plato 1164. “Nothing happens by chance in social activity. If this happens, then it was planned so.” — Franklin d. Roosevelt1165. "If you are not criticized, you may not be going to do much." — Donald h. Rumsfeld1166. “Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite." — John kenneth galbraith1167. "The ideal form of government is democracy spiced with murder." — Voltaire1168."The great thing about democracy is that it gives every voter the chance to create something stupid." - Art spender1169. "Ninety percent of politicians create a bad reputation for the ordinary ten percent." - Henry a. Kissinger1170. “I am an ecologist. ... I'm in favor of invigorating air." - Ronald reagan1171. "The best thing about this group of candidates is that not only one of the specified list will win." - Will rogers1172. "If i could do everything it's also time, i'd be a farmer." - Mobutu sese seko1173. "Revolutions are frightening, but electoral campaigns are disgusting." - Nicholas gomez davila1174. "Call it what you like, encouragement is what makes a person to work harder." - Nikiya khrushchev1175. "I was just a novice dictator. I have never been a real dictator." - Augusto pinochet1176. "Governments learn nothing. Only people learn. — Milton friedman1177. "My idea of a pleasant viewer is a person who agrees with me." — Benjamin disraeli1178. “Any man who wants to be president is either selfish or crazy.” - Dwight eisenhower1179. “Murder is forbidden; that is why all murderers are punished, unless films kill en masse and to the sound of trumpets." - Voltaire1180. "Truth is more important than facts." - Frank lloyd wright1181. "Our company does not expel journalists, but they can leave whenever they want." - Charles taylor1182. "What good is a democracy if a porn bunny is not for the poor?" - Ferdinand marcos1183. Things have given nothing but a headache." - Mohammed reza pahlavi 1184. "Politics is when you say that you are planning one thing, but intend to do another. Then you never do either.” - Saddam hussein1185. "A leader leads by example, not by force." - Sun tzu1186. “Humanity must put an end to war, otherwise war will put an end to humanity. - John f. Kennedy1187. "These are my principles in case you don't like them... Well, i have others." - Groucho marx1188. "Problems with free elections is, you never know who will win." - Leonid brezhnev1189. "One murder makes a villain, millions of heroes. I consecrate the numbers, well done." - Charlie chaplin 1190. "Today - a semiconductor plant. In the next sowing season - a plant of entire conductors!" - Todor zhivkov1191. "The police belong to the people, and the people belong to the police." - Todor zhivkov1192. "In my country, we are put in jail first, and then become president." - Nelson mandela1193. "There should be no crisis next week. My schedule is already full." — Henry kissinger1194. "Whatever the limitations of the paranoid there may be enemies." — Henry kissinger1195. “The issues are too important for chilean voters to decide for themselves. ." - Henry kissinger1196. "Dictatorship would be a hell of a lot easier in the forum there's not the slightest doubt." - George bush1197. “My task is for everyone in zimbabwe to fight cricket; the basic rule is that our country be a nation of gentlemen." - Robert mugabe1198. "It is better to own 10% of an elephant than 100% of a rat." - Arthur mutambara1199. "As a rule, as a prime minister, i do not i can be a liar." - Silvio berlusconi1200. "Let it be true, what matters is only what people think is true." - Paul watson1201. "Whoever misses the ussr has no heart. Everyone who wants to get him back has no brains." - Vladimir putin1202. "There is no such thing as a former kgb officer." - Vladimir putin1203. "You have to obey the law, around the clock, and not just when you are grabbed for a certain - important - place." - Vladimir putin1204. "The regime is afraid of the people, because it knows that free and fair elections will bring it to an end." - Viktor yushchenko1205. "Oh when we think we can make ends meet, someone makes ends meet." - Herbert hoover1206. "You can't buy happiness at a set price, but you can't buy poverty either." - Leo rosten1207. "Take care to get what the user likes, or you will be forced to love what you get." - George bernard shaw1208. Nostalgia is the realization of food that everything is not as unbearable as it seemed then.1209 . "Problems don't happen because of what our employees don't know; our specialists know that this is not entirely true. — Will rogers1210. “It is not easy to solve my misunderstandings in one area when information refuses to obey.” — Ashley brilliant1211. "It's a small world, but i wouldn't want to draw it." - Stephen wright1212. "If you want a place in the sun, you need to wait for some blisters." - Dear abby1213. "If god really wanted the players to fly, he would make it easy to get to the airport." -George winters1214. Common sense comes from experience; and skills, well, this is from wrong judgments.1215. "Few things are more satisfying than seeing your descendants have personal teenagers." - Doug larson1216."Conscience is the inner voice that warns us what a person might find." - H. L. Mencken1217. "Fresh directions await around every corner." - Stanislav lec1218. "Be kind to you on the stairs up because people on the route down will need them." - Wilson mizner1219. "Happiness forever! No living person could bear it, only hell within is needed.” - George bernard shaw1220. "Marriage is a great institution, but i'm also not ready for an institution." - Mae west.1221. "Love heals people, both the people who give it and those who receive it." - Dr. Carl menninger1222. "Speak when you're angry and you'll give the best speech you'll ever regret." - Ambrose biers1223. Never consider that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.1224. "It is always bold to say such a fact that different people think." - Georges duhamel1225. "One kind word can warm three winter months." - Japanese proverb1226. If you want to know what a man is, put him in power.1227. "There's nothing cooler than curling up with a class book after a house has to be redecorated." - Joe ryan1228. To think about the future is to be unhappy today.1229. “Most likely, practically all laws are useless, because good people do not require laws, and bad people do not become more complicated from them.” - Demonax1230. "Injustice everywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." - Martin luther king jr1231. "If we make peaceful revolution impossible, we make violent revolution inevitable." - John f. Kennedy1232. "The jury consists of twelve people chosen to decide who has the best lawyer." - Robert frost1233. Why do you push the remote control harder when you realize the battery is low?1234. Last night i turned on a blank cassette to the fullest. Mime also went crazy.1235. “The truth matters most, even when it upsets and overwhelms us.” - Henri frederic amie1236. The fewer facts, the stronger the opinion.1237. "On the plane of reason, what is held to be true either is true or becomes true." - John lilly1238. "I may not agree with the statement that you have decided to say, but i will defend your case for a long time to say it." - Voltaire1239. "Comedy is a pretty easy-to-fun way to get serious." - Peter ustinov1240. Experience enables you to recognize a mistake in case you make it again.1241. The committee is a category of people who take minutes and waste hours.1242. Murphy's law of thermodynamics: pressure makes things worse!1243. Pessimist: a person who, given a choice of two evils, chooses both.1244. Plan to be early because you will always be late.1245. Where there is a will, there is an inheritance tax.1246. "Better three hours before than a moment later." - William shakespeare1247. Mathematics and alcohol are incompatible. Please don't drink or excrete.1248. I would not touch the imperial system of measurement with a 3.048 m pole.1249. I'm sinking, so i swam.1250. It doesn't matter if you win or lose until you lose.1251. "If you don't change, you won't." - Bruce barton1252. “I have great actors in my life, but i can’t understand the plot.” - Ashley brilliant1253. "Let everyone sweep in front of their door, and the whole planet will be clean." - Goethe1254. "I use not only any of my brains, but absolutely everything i can borrow." - Woodrow wilson1255. "I prefer the errors of enthusiasm to the indifference of wisdom." - Anatole france1256. “I made mistakes, but i didn’t make mistakes at all, claiming that i never made them.” — James g. Bennet1257. “Compromise is a good umbrella but a bad roof; this is a temporary remedy. - James russell lowell1258. Be optimistic, at least until the animals are driven in pairs to cape kennedy.1259. "I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast." - W. C. Fields1260. You make progress if each error is new.1261. Disclaimer: any spelling, tact or factual errors are transmission errors.1262. Adding jobs to a late software project makes it later.1263. “I wonder why you always have the opportunity to read the bill of a specialist and never read his prescription?” - Finlay peter dunn1264. Is the glass half empty, half full, or twice as much?1265. Doesn't a man care that doctors call what films do "practice"?1266. "I'm like. Round shape, isn't it?" - George carlin1267. If you are in a car moving at the speed of light, what happens if you look at the headlights?1268. "If crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fire, step, what are freedom fighters fighting?" - George carlin1269."Better a flawed diamond than a flawless pebble." - Confucius1270. "Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by what you didn't do than by the fact that you did." - Mark twain1271.Sometimes each of us has days when we are 386 on earth p4.1272. Looks are eye-catching. Personality captures the heart.1273. If i never had a bad moment, how would i know that i had a good day?1274. If you need to be alone, try cleaning the apartment.1275. Beautiful relationships do not depend on how well someone is meant, but on how well we avoid misunderstandings.1276. Of course, men are able to act at the same time they read in the toilet.1277. At the end of each tunnel there is light, just pray that this is not a train.1278. “Wine is the stubborn proof of food that god loves us and loves to see us happy.” - Benjamin franklin1279. "When i go to a bar, i'm not looking for a girl who knows the capital of maine." - David brenner1280. Tv is chewing gum for the eyes. - Frank lloyd wright1281. "There is no better feeling in the world than a box of warm pizza on your lap." - Kevin james1282. "Roses are red, violets are blue, i'm schizophrenic and so am i." - Oscar the levant1283. “A recession is when a neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours." - Ronald reagan1284. "Originality is the beautiful art of remembering everything you hear but forgetting where you heard it." - Lawrence j. Peter1285. "My theory is that all scottish cuisine is based on defiance." - Mike myers1286. "Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salary of a large research staff to look at a problem." - Bill vaughan1287. "I never said much of what i said." - Yogi berra1288. “I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me." - Warren buffett1289. "I'm the literary equivalent of a big mac with a crop of fries." - Stephen king1290. "First collect the facts, and the next day you can distort them as the owner wants." - Mark twain1291. "Food, love, careers and mothers are the four main guilt groups." - Cathy gizwith1292. "Behind every great man is a woman who rolls her eyes." - Jim carrey1293. "Wise people don't need words - stupid people need advice." - Bill cosby1294. I'd rather tell you one truth that scares you than a hundred lies that you like.1295. My drinking team has bowling ailments.1296. Is not an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.1297. The farther the future is, the cooler it looks.1298. Keep track of your thoughts, they are sometimes words at any time.1299. Whose idea was it to put the letter "c" in the word "lisp"?1300. A fine is a tax for a wrong action. A tax is a penalty for good deeds.1301. True friendship comes when silence between several people is comfortable.1302. What if there were no hypothetical questions?1303. The problem with punctuality is that no one will appreciate it.1304. Alcohol doesn't solve any unforeseen situations...But neither does milk.1305. The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.1306. Materialism: buying clothes that we do not need for money that a person does not need, we should never impress people who do not matter.1307. People tend to set rules for others, and exceptions for browsing.1308. It is human nature to err, and blaming others for it means showing managerial potential.1309. Save the dream: press the snooze button.1310. Haiku are light. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.1311. Tv may offend your intellect, but nothing affects it like a computer.1312. You can learn something stupid in any field.1313. I like the work. It mesmerizes me. I sit and look at him for hours.1314. Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole.1315. If you're not sure, murmur.1316. You can't buy happiness for a certain price, but it's easier to live with misfortune.1317. Perhaps my opinion has changed, but it's not a nuance that i'm right.1318. The diplomat is the one who can send you to hell so that you will become excited about this trip.1319. Behind every successful man, his woman makes sense. Behind the fall of a successful guy is another woman first.1320. Good girls are bad girls who never get caught.1321. I didn't make it to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian.1322. You can't buy happiness for a certain price, but it's easier to cry in a bmw than on a bicycle.1323. Opportunities should never be missed, they can only be set by another person.1324. Don't worry about the nuances and don't stroke the sweaty ones.1325. Anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.1326.Never ignore opportunities to say absolutely nothing.1327. "Don't tell me the sky is the top bar when there are footprints on the moon." - Brandt paul1328. Why do we kill people to show people that killing people is wrong?1329. I didn't have time to write a short letter, so i wrote a long one.1330. "There's no traffic for the extra mile." - Zig ziglar1331. "Cut my pie into 4 pieces, i don't think i can eat eight." - Yogi berra1332. “For customers i am an atheist, for god i am a loyal opposition.” - Woody allen1333. "If you want to make enemies, try to change something." - Woodrow wilson1334. “A conservative is someone who sits and thinks. Just sitting." - Woodrow wilson1335. "Thought is free." - William shakespeare1336. “Everyone is ignorant, mostly in some subjects.” - Will rogers1337. “Price – we offer what you pay. The value is what you get." - Warren buffett1338. "Take me to the bar! We'll have breakfast together!" - W. C. Fields1339. "It's not about what they call you, but about what events you respond to." - W. C. Fields1340. “I don’t drink water in my life because of the disgusting things that fish do with it.” - W. C. Fields1341. “I am free from all prejudices. I hate everyone equally." - W. C. Fields1342. "I don't know where i'm going, but i'm on the road." - Voltaire1343. "Every person is guilty of absolutely everything good, his use did not do it." - Voltaire1344. "Common sense is not so primitive." - Voltaire1345. “Does a nation need to be free if it oppresses other nations? Can not". - Vladimir lenin1346. "Lies told quite often become the truth." - Vladimir lenin1347. “I never worked a day. Everything was fun." - Thomas alva edison1348. "Hell, there are no rules - we want to achieve something." - Thomas alva edison1349. "In case you are at the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on." - Theodore roosevelt1350. "The reason fat people are so kind is because they can't fight or run." - Theodore roosevelt1351. "Knowing food that's right doesn't really matter if you're never going to do it, that's the fact that's right." - Theodore roosevelt1352. “Opportunities multiply as they are exploited.” - Sun tzu1353. "All wars employ deception." - Sun tzu1354. “In all schools it’s really possible to walk, maybe you will find time.” - Stephen wright1355. "Innovation distinguishes the leader from the follower." - Steve jobs1356. “Design is not just about how it looks and what the landing page feels like. Design is how it works.” - Steve jobs1357. “I can’t have you reminding me of my age. I have a bladder in order to make this place me. - Stephen fry1358. "When an argument is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser." - Socrates1359. "I am not an athenian or a greek, but a citizen of the world." - Socrates1360. “When inspiration doesn’t come to me, i go to meet it halfway.” - Sigmund freud1361. "Do not be afraid of perfection - you will never achieve such a bear cub." - Salvador dali1362. "Cocaine is god's version of saying you gain quite a lot of finance." - Robin williams1363. "For every minute of your anger, you waste sixty seconds of happiness." - Ralph waldo emerson1364. "In a caterpillar, there is nothing to say about everything that the page will become a butterfly." - R. Buckminster fuller1365. “I'm not a genius. I'm really a crazy bundle of experience." - R. Buckminster fuller1366. "Love is a serious mental illness." - Plato1367. "Only the dead have seen the end of the war." - Plato1368. "Be kind, because everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle." - Plato1369. “It is necessary to copy others, but it is a pity to copy yourself.” - Pablo picasso1370. "The purpose of art is to wash the dust of everyday life from our souls." - Pablo picasso1371. “Put off until tomorrow only everything that you are going to die without doing anything.” - Pablo picasso1372. "I would like to live like a poor man with a lot of money." - Pablo picasso1373. Seat belts are not as restrictive as wheelchairs.1374. A deal is something you don't need at a price a person can't resist.1375. When tempted to put out a fire with fire, remember that firemen usually use water.1376. There's a fine line between embracing and being alone so this gift can't get away.1377. “I intend to stay forever. So far so good." - Stephen wright1378. Those who smile in crisis have found the culprit.1379. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.1380. The main reason santa is so funny is because he knows where all the bad girls live.1381. The only purpose of a child's middle name is to enable him to tell if he is really in a difficult situation.1382.The tibia is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.1383. As it turns out, one big careless match can start a forest fire, but a whole box is needed for a fire?1384. If fucking is a pain in the ass, then you did it wrong.1385. The evening news begins with a "greeting" and then goes on to explain why it's not.1386. Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not about putting it in a fruit salad.1387. We're not really growing up yet, we're just learning how to act in public.1388. Humans have two emotions: hunger and excitement. If you see these tests without an erection, make him a sandwich.1389. Going to church doesn't make you a christian any more than being in a garage doesn't make you a car.1390. The fair sex can simulate an orgasm. But men can imitate whole relationships.1391. One more thing my goal to do is to hurt you. However, he is still on the list.1392. An economist is a person who tomorrow finds out, for some reason, that what he predicted yesterday did not happen today.1393. There are several kinds of lies: lies, blatant lies, and real estate listings.1394. Every time my partner sings, i have to go for a walk. Not now it is absolutely not necessary to turn away from her, but to prove to the neighbors that i do not beat her.1395. The main cause of car accidents is the loosening of the bolt in the nut behind the wheel.1396. What else makes a person more productive than the last minute.1397. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, then what does a humanist eat?1398. The college is a storehouse of knowledge and the youth are here to drink.1399. Age has its advantages. Too bad i can't know what it is.1400. They call our language native, because my father rarely speaks.1401. "Of all the things i've lost, what i miss the most is my personal mind." - Ozzy osbourne1402. "It could have been worse... I could have been sting." - Ozzy osbourne1403. “Being sober on a train is completely different than being drunk on a train.” - Ozzy osbourne1404. “Loving yourself is the beginning of a romance once and for all.” - Oscar wilde1405. “I don't want to go to heaven. Exchange your kiwi for bitcoins. After that, none of my friends." - Oscar wilde1406. "Be yourself, many other roles are already taken." - Oscar wilde1407. "Always forgive your enemies, nothing irritates porn models more." - Oscar wilde1408. "A thing is not necessarily true, because a person dies for it." - Oscar wilde1409. "A cynic is a person who knows the price of everything, but appreciates nothing." - Oscar wilde1410. “Style is knowing who you are, what you want to celebrate and not giving a damn.” - Orson welles1411. "A writer needs a pen, an artist needs a brush, and a filmmaker needs an army." - Orson welles1412. "Politics is not gaining respect for morality." - Niccolo machiavelli1413. "Nothing great has ever been achieved without risk." - Niccolo machiavelli1414. "Not titles honor people, but representatives of the stronger sex honor titles." - Niccolo machiavelli1415. "Care leads too." - Nelson mandela1416. "I am the captain of my soul." - Nelson mandela1417. "You can't fight if you think you look stupid on a horse." - Napoleon bonaparte1418. "The best way to keep a word is to interfere with it." - Napoleon bonaparte1419. "History is a collection of consistent lies." - Napoleon bonaparte1420. “I love children, in particular, when information cries, due to the fact that someone then takes them away.” - Nancy mitford1421. "Humanity does not know of any equipment that would not allow people to be idiots." - Mark rush1422. "Live in a meaningful way: so that others can simply live." - Mother teresa1423. "If you can't feed a hundred people, feed one." - Mother teresa1424. "An eye for an eye will only blind the whole world." - Mohandas gandhi1425. “The past cannot be changed. The future is still in your hands." - Mary pickford1426. “To add sound to the cinema is like putting on lips with the venus de milo.” - Mary pickford1427. "The 1st time someone shows you who they are, trust them." - Maya angelou1428. "We must live together like brothers or die together like fools." - Martin luther king1429. "There is always the right time to do the right thing." - Martin luther king1430. “Never put off until later absolutely everything that is worth doing the day after tomorrow.” - Mark twain1431. “The name of the greatest inventor. Accident". - Mark twain1432. "To heaven for the climate and throughout hell for the company." - Mark twain1433. “Be careful about reading books about yourself. You get the chance to die from a typo." - Mark twain1434. "I was on the calendar, but never on time." - Marilyn monroe1435. "Maybe you have to fight more than once to win it." - Margaret thatcher1436. “If a little is good, and the rest is better, then a lot is what is needed.” - Mae west1437."I'll try something once, twice if i like it, three times to make sure." - Mae west1438. "Usually i avoid temptations if i can't resist them." - Mae west1439. "Don't make a man guess for a long time - he will certainly find the answer somewhere else." - Mae west1440. "Don't cry for the person who left you - the next one might fall in love with your smile." - Mae west1441. “Absolutely anything worth doing should be done slowly.” - Mae west1442. "Masters of life and losers are not born, they are a product of their thinking." - Lou holtz1443. “It’s not the load that breaks you, but often the way you carry it.” - Lou holtz1444. "Learning without striving corrupts the memory and does not always retain anything that one learns." - Leonardo da vinci1445. "To produce people after you, go after them." - Lao tzu1446. "He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is another mighty one." - Lao tzu1447. “Failure is the foundation of success and the way to achieve it.” - Lao tzu1448. "A good traveler doesn't have fixed plans and risk doesn't tend to come." - Lao tzu1449. "Wishing to be a different person is a waste of who you are." - Kurt cobain1450. "Better to be hated for who i am than loved for who i am not." - Kurt cobain1451. “Friends are quite natural and it is not surprising that the rest, like well-known enemies.” - Kurt cobain1452. "If god made for himself something better than women, i guess he left it in his hands." - Kris kristofferson1453. "Religion is the opium of the masses." - Karl marx1454. “Those who vote, you see, do not decide anything. Those who count the votes decide everything.” - Joseph stalin1455. "History has shown that there are no invincible armies." - Joseph stalin1456. “Reading is for the brain of action what gymnastics is for the body.” - Joseph addison1457. "The real test of a man's character is what he does when he's not huffing." - John wooden1458. "Listen if you intend to be heard." - John wooden1459. "Don't confuse activity with achievement." - John wooden1460. "Don't let making a living get in the way of making a living." - John wooden1461. "Life is hard, even harder if you're stupid." - John wayne1462. "The time you spent with pleasure is not spent by chance." - John lennon1463. "Forgive your enemies, but you never need to know their names." - John f. Kennedy1464. "Fear is the foundation of most governments." - John adams1465. "Knowledge speaks and wisdom listens." - Jimi hendrix1466. "If you're never willing to risk just about anything out of the ordinary, you'll have to settle for the ordinary." - Jim rohn1467. "Either you rule the day or the day rules you." - Jim rohn1468. "Discipline is the bridge between challenge and achievement." - Jim rohn1469. "The person who controls the media controls the mind." - Jim morrison1470. “A friend is a person who gives you the freedom you want to be yourself.” — Jim morrison1471. "Whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right." - Henry ford1472. "Vision without execution is just a hallucination." - Henry ford1473. "The only real mistake is one from which our organization does not learn anything." - Henry ford1474. "There is nothing particularly difficult, if the effort involved, divide it into small tasks." - Henry ford1475. "Chop your own firewood and it will warm you doubly." - Henry ford1476. "Our true nationality is humanity." - Herbert wells1477. "If our employees do not end the war, the war will end us." - Herbert wells1478. "Advertising is a legal lie." - Herbert wells1479. “Yesterday is dead, tomorrow has not yet come. I only have one day and i will be happy at the club.” - Groucho marx1480. "Military justice is to justice what military music is to music." - Groucho marx1481. “No matter how hard i try, i never forget my jaws, but in your case i would be happy to make an exception.” - Groucho marx1482. "I have nothing for you but a confession and not much." - Groucho marx1483. "Enjoy when you can, and endure when you must." - Goethe1484. "As soon as you believe in the composition, you will know how to live." - Goethe1485. “Better to be alone than in bad company.” - George washington1486. "One who dances is considered crazy by people who can't hear the music." - George carlin1487. “He who does not want to change his mind cannot change anything.” - George bernhard shaw1488. "Comrades who say something cannot be done should not interfere with the people who we are doing." - George bernhard shaw1489. “My way of joking is to tell the truth. This is the funniest joke on earth." - George bernhard shaw1490. "A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but also more effective than a life spent doing nothing." - George bernhard shaw1491. "Leisure allows you to agree to do nothing." - G.K. Chesterton1492."When a hundred people stand together, one of them goes crazy and gets another." - Friedrich nietzsche1493. “Making great things is hard, but commanding great things is harder.” - Friedrich nietzsche1494. "There are no facts, there are only interpretations." - Friedrich nietzsche1495. "There are no eternal facts, as there are none, and absolute truths." - Friedrich nietzsche1496. "The lonely one very quickly extends his hand to the one he meets." - Friedrich nietzsche1497. "He who has a reason to live can bear almost anyone." - Friedrich nietzsche1498. "For every person there is a bait, then he does not have time not to swallow." - Friedrich nietzsche1499. "The politician divides humanity into 2 classes: technology and enemies." - Friedrich nietzsche1500. "There are many ways to improve, but only one method to stay put." - Franklin d. Roosevelt1501. “Men are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own mind.” - Franklin d. Roosevelt1502. “Truth is like the sun. You get the opportunity to close her process, but the porn bunny will not be lost. - Elvis presley1503. "You always admire what you don't really understand." - Eleanor roosevelt1504. "What needs to be done can traditionally be ordered." - Eleanor roosevelt1505. "Few people can make the viewer feel worse without everyone's consent." - Eleanor roosevelt1506. "No leader exists so far ahead of his followers." - Eleanor roosevelt1507. "It's not fair to demand from alternatives what you don't want to do yourself." - Eleanor roosevelt1508. "I love deadlines. I love the whistling sound they make when they fly by." - Douglas adams1509. "The cure for boredom in curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity." - Dorothy parker1510. "You will never succeed if you are afraid of what you are doing." - Dale carnegie us several times more audacity than our company's previous versions dreamed of. Perhaps." - Dale carnegie1512. "Fear does not exist anywhere except in the mind." - Dale carnegie1513. "Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values." - The dalai lama1514. "In terms of tolerance, the enemy is the best teacher." - The dalai lama1515. “Happiness is not something ready-made. This is the result of your own actions." - The dalai lama1516. If you were less intelligent, you would have to water twice a week.1517. I would agree with the player, but in that case we were both would be wrong.1518 "better people have called me worse" - pierre trudeau1519 "the naked truth is always wiser than the best-dressed lie" - ann landers1520 i'm not sorry that you lied to me, i am saddened by people that now i cannot believe you" - friedrich nietzsche 1521. "A harmful truth is better than a useful lie." - Thomas mann1522. Think everything through literally to the end, before you finish thinking.1523. "Don't complain about the snow in your neighbor's basement if it's dirty on your doorstep" - confucius1524. "Choose a job" you love, and the buyer does not have to work even a second in his life." - Confucius1525. "Random changes test the reliability of friends." - Marcus tullius cicero1526. "Any user is capable of making mistakes, but only an idiot persists in this delusion." - Marcus tullius cicero1527. "After you become predictable, no one else studies." - Chet atkins1528. "There is nothing better than a friend if there is no friend chocolate." - Charles dickens1529. "There is wisdom of the head, but there is wisdom of the heart." - Charles dickens1530. "There are books that have roots and roots are not yet root." - Charles dickens 1531. "It is a cursed evil for every net-user to be as absorbed in any object as i am in mine." - Charles darwin 1532. "An unsatisfied desire is itself more desirable than any satisfaction."-K s. Lewis1533. "The tongue is like a sharp knife... It kills without shedding blood" - buddha1534. Renew." - Buddha1535. "More beautiful than a thousand empty words, one word that brings peace." - Buddha1536. "There is no road to joy, happiness is the way." - Buddha1537. "The pitcher is filled drop by drop." - Buddha1538. "The key to immortality is to first live the life you remember." - Bruce lee1539. "If you don't want to stumble tomorrow, tell the truth today." - Bruce lee1540. "Defeat is not defeat if you don't accept it as a reality in your mind." - Bruce lee1541. "Boards, do not beat in rebuke." - Bruce lee1542. "A wise man can learn more from a stupid question than a fool from a wise answer." - Bruce lee1543. "A task is not at any moment meant to be achieved, it often serves simply as something to strive for." - Bruce lee1544. “Love the life you live. Live the life you love." - Bob marley1545. “Very often, potential patients feel the rain. Others just get wet.” - Bob marley1546. "One quality thing about music: when it touches you, you don't feel pain."- Bob marley1547. "The most dissatisfied customers are your best source of knowledge." - Bill gates1548. “Success is a bad teacher. He seduces smart people into thinking they can't fail." - Bill gates1549. "If you're not capable of doing it well, at least make it look good." - Bill gates1550. “Be polite to nerds. Surely you will end up working for one of them.” - Bill gates1551. "There is no bad peace with us, no good war." - Benjamin franklin1552. "Justice will not be served until those who are not affected dare to be as outraged as those who have suffered." - Benjamin franklin1553. “Wine is wisdom, beer is freedom, water is bacteria.” - Benjamin franklin1554. "I didn't fail the test, i just found 100 ways to do it wrong." - Benjamin franklin1555. "He who knows how to contain patience can have everything he wants." - Benjamin franklin1556. “Early to bed and early to rise makes a person healthy, abundant and wise.” - Benjamin franklin1557. "Don't rush to choose a friend, change slowly." - Benjamin franklin1558. "A creative person is driven by the desire to make good money, but not by the desire to win over others." - Ayn rand1559. “Who knows, he does. Who really realizes, he teaches. - Aristotle1560. "Our company does not see things as they are, we see them as we are." - Anais nin1561. "Peace cannot be preserved by force, it is achieved only by understanding." - Albert einstein1562. "Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them." - Albert einstein1563. "I don't know with what weapons the second world war will be carried out, but the fourth world war will be carried out with sticks and stones." - Albert einstein1564. "An empty stomach is a bad political adviser." - Albert einstein1565. "A man who has never made a mistake never tasted anything fresh." -Albert einstein1566. "Success goes from defeat to failure without losing enthusiasm." - Abraham lincoln1567. "I don't like this specialist. I should calculate him better." - Abraham lincoln1568. "Because our case is new, we have to think again." - Abraham lincoln1569. No one notices what i'm doing until i do it.1570. Happiness is what you decide, but not what happens to the client.1571. "The best cure for insomnia is monday morning." - Sandy cooley1572. “I'm not unsuccessful yet. I just found 10,000 methods that are missing." - Thomas alva edison1573. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery, and now is a gift; that's why they call it real." — Eleanor roosevelt1574. Two offenses won't make you right, but three will get you back on the highway.1575. “A five year old would understand that. Send someone for a five-year-old child. - Groucho marx1576. When your wife is determined to learn to drive, don't stand in her way." - Stan levenson1578. "Everyone needs to believe in some way. I think i'll have another drink." — W. C. Fields1579. “I told the doctor that i broke my leg in two places. He told me to stop going to this place." - Henny youngman1580. "To fly is to learn to throw yourself on the ground and miss." - Douglas adams1581. "When i die, my task is to walk peacefully, like my grandfather , while sleeping, but not screaming like the passengers in his car." - Jack handy1582. "The visitor who smiles when something goes completely wrong, invented someone to blame for it" - robert bloch1583. "Before they invented drawing boards, why did they come back?"-George carlin1584. "The day knows what the morning didn't know."-Cousin woodman1585. "Regardless of how old you are, there is always that good thing to look forward to" - lynn johnston1586. "Life is not about diagnosing yourself. Life is about how to create yourself." - George bernard shaw1587. "Absolutely everything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung." - Voltaire1588. "I'm not a vegetarian because i love animals. I'm a vegetarian because i hate plants." - A. Whitney brown1589. "How can a project be a year behind schedule? Slowly." - Fred brooks1590. "When i first see a smiling runner, i'll think about it." - Joan rivers1591. "Better to have a stable salary than to be exciting." - Oscar wilde1592. "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." - Ambrose redmoon1593. "Courage is the resistance to fear, the mastery of fear, but not the absence of fear." - Mark twain1594. If love is blind, why is underwear so popular?1595. "Many people would rather be in complete confidence such a wallpaper is unhappy than risk being happy. ." — Robert anthony1596."A diplomat is a person who always remembers a woman's birthday, but does not yet know her age." — Robert frost1597. "So the best way to be happy is to make the other person happy." - The dalai lama1598. "A generation that ignores history, with no past or future." - Robert a. Heinlein1599. To whom sometimes giving advice, sometimes accepting it.1600 i quote people to express myself more fully.1601 light travels faster than sound which is why some people seem bright until you know how much they talk .1602. "There are two possibilities, either we are alone in the world, and we are not. Both are equally terrible. "- Arthur c. Clarke1603. Resistance is not useless, it is voltage divided by current.1604. " Look to the future, for that is where you will spend the rest of your life." - George burns1605. "Berkeley has two major products, lsd and unix. We don't think it's such a coincidence." - Jeremy s. Anderson1606 "migrant workers who think they know everything irritate those of us who don't know" - isaac asimov1607 "the most exciting a phrase that can be heard in science, one that portends new discoveries, is not “eureka!”, But it’s funny ... ”- Isaac asimov 1608. “Life is nice. Death is calm. Only the transition is difficult. - Isaac asimov1609. "You'll get a great opportunity to delay, but time won't." - Benjamin franklin1610. "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius develops its own limits." - Albert einstein1611. "It's terrifying to see that our technology has surpassed our humanity." - Albert einstein1612. “Any fool can know. Meaning is in order to realize. - Albert einstein1613. "Business is not that i'm afraid to die, i just don't want to be there when it happens." - Woody allen1614. "I intend to exist forever or die trying." - Groucho marx1615. "I don't care about belonging to any club where i will be a member." - Groucho marx1616. “Physics is like sex. Of course, it allows you to feel some practical results, but we provide services for it not for this." - Richard feynman 1617. "It is not enough that we produce everything necessary; sometimes we have to do whatever we want." - Winston churchill1618. "Do you have enemies? Good. This implies that in the last century in everyday life, you performed in this. — Winston churchill1619. "I can resist anything but temptation." — Oscar wilde1620. “Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the airplane, the pessimist invents the parachute." - George bernard shaw1621. It is wiser to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and dispel all doubts.1622. "Clothes make it an expert. Naked people have practically no effect on society" - mark twain1623. "Once a computer beat me at chess, but in kickboxing it is no match for me" - emo philips1624. Laptop - was created to solve issues that hasn't happened yet." -Bill gates1625. "Always code because the guy who's going to spin your code one way or another is going to be a violent psychopath who knows where you live."-Damian conway1626 "boys will be boys, and without that there are a huge number of middle-aged men" - keen hubbard 1627. "Everyone thinks about changing the world, but no person thinks about raising himself" - leo tolstoy. 1628 systems are not built from metaphors, paradigms, and methodologies, they are made up of code, wires, and hardware.1629 faster hardware does not solve business problems unless the business problem is related to slower hardware.1630. Correction always took longer and cost more.1631 old ideas became so because they were useful.1632. "I always do what i cannot do so that i can learn n how to do it." - Pablo picasso1633. "Patience develops personal limits - it is not convenient and its cowardice." - George jackson1634 "people no longer do evil so subtly and joyfully as at the time when the movies do it out of religious conviction" - blaise pascal1635. In case you find something that you take away from the users, they will drag it away it is secret.1636. "Our existence is a given disease transmitted by an intimate way" - r. D. Lang1637. "The optimist confirms that we exist in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears that this is true" - james branch cabell1638. Linux is only free in fact if precious minutes are useless.1639. "There is no such thing as death, our existence is but a dream, and we are our own imagination." - Bill hicks1640 "a lie travels half the world before the truth has time to put its pants on" - winston churchill1641 come to the dark side - we have cookies.1642. “I had a show. Then there was another show. I now have a twitter profile. - Conan o'brien1643."I often wanted to drown the difficulties, but i can't get my wife to go swimming." - Jimmy carter1644. “Programmers don't die anymore. They just become a legacy.” - Epsilon011645. Two mistakes are not made true, but two wrights built an airplane.1646. Punctuality is the dignity of the bored. - Evelyn wau1647. "I don't mean to sound bitter or cold or cruel, but that's because that's how it works." - Bill hicks1648. You really control your life only when you admit that you are not.1649. “The only thing i regret in life is transportation, which i am not someone else.” - Woody allen1650. "First get the facts, and then you can distort them at your leisure." - Mark twain1651. "Pure and reliable truth is seldom purified and the ordinary can never be obtained." - Oscar wilde1652. "All programmers are optimists." - Frederick p. Brooks, jr.1653. A gentleman is a citizen who knows how to play - the accordion, he has by no means stopped playing.1654. I refuse to fight an intellectual battle with an unarmed man.1655. If you can find the path peacefully, it probably won't get you very far.1656. What you see cannot be unseen.1657. Don't look if you're not ready to see.1658. If voting could really change anything, it would be illegal.1659. I have a drinking problem - bars close at 2am.4:60pm. Let's play carpenter, first they kill us, and then i'll beat you.1661. “Failure is when you want the opportunity to start again, this time more rationally.” - Henry ford1662. "Don't attribute to malice that which you might as well attribute without much difficulty to stupidity." - Hanlon's razor1663. "Logic, like whiskey, loses its usefulness if taken in bulky quantities." - Lord dunsany1664. To err is human, to really screw up, you need the root password.1665. Xml is like violence. If that doesn't solve your problem, you'll definitely feel comfortable using it insufficiently.1666. People will believe any lie, either because they try to make it true, or because they are afraid that it is true.1667. Suddenly something can go wrong, for sure, it has already happened.1668. Blondes have more fun, but brunettes remember it the next day.1669. Whatever happens, ignore it.1670. A useful mode of existence is really the slowest speed, from where you get a wonderful opportunity to die.1671. Someone is very important to me! Are you really bad?1672. I am busy right now. May i ignore you another time?1673. I don't care who you are! Get those reindeer off my roof!1674. I am not mentally ill, i easily have difficulty with reality.1675. To be is to do - socrates, to do is to be - sartre, to do, do, be to do - sinatra1676. Don't follow me, i'm lost too.1677. If not for the last minute, nothing would have ever been done.1678. To err is hunam.1679. "Everyone has a plan until that money hits." - Mike tyson1680. Horn if you love peace and joy.1681. I used to be indecisive, but with the development of technology, i'm not sure.1682. Change is inevitable, minus the vending machines.1683. I didn't have time to fix your brakes, considering the above, i made your horn louder.1684. "Lest they call her a coquette, she was, by definition, easily inferior." - Charles, count talleyrand1685. To err is human, to err is a pirate.1686. If the viewer succeeds at first, make an effort not to look surprised.1687. "It's crazy to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results." - Rita may brown1688. “Hard work has never killed a man, but why take the risk?” - Edgar bergen1689. "Programming is like sex: one mistake and you're a lifelong supporter." - Michael sintz1690. "If i mistreat and no one sees me, one less lie i'll have to tell later." — Dave dunsit1691. Canis meus it comeedit. My dog ate it.1692. The section for smokers in the dining room is similar to the section for urinating when swimming.1693. Time flies like a bullet. Fruit flies like a banana.1694. It is better to be a famous drunk than a nameless alcoholic.1695. Are you tormented by the noise in my head?1696. Monday is the root of all evil.1697. The passion is not whether you win or lose, but how you look when you play.1698. I'm not crazy, but the voices in my head are crazy.1699. “Remember to be yourself every moment. In case you don't suck." - Joss whedon1700. See, vichi, veni. I saw, i conquered, i came.1701. You won't learn anything when a mule hits you again.1702. I only drink to make other members of society more sociable.1703. If earlier you can not; call it version 1.0.1704.“You laugh at me because i am different. I laugh at you because you are the same about everything. - Jonathan davies1705. There are no stupid questions, there are stupid newcomers, because they ask questions.1706. I'm trying to look at the situation from your point of view, but i can't get my head that far up your ass.1707. The one who said that there is nothing unattainable, despite even great efforts, never tried to slam the revolving door.1708. "Great thinkers have always faced opposition from mediocre minds." - Albert einstein1709. Only drug addicts lose their drugs.1710. Marriage is great; divorce, one hundred thousand.1711. “In math the player doesn't know things. You just get used to it." - Johann von neumann1712. The only way to entertain many people is to listen to them.1713. It is amazing that some young fools survive and become old fools.1714. “I like long walks, especially when they are taken by migrant workers, which annoys me.” - Fred allen1715. If we don't defend freedom of speech, we won't know what fools are for.1716. Every second person you know is below average.1717. "Many people legally confuse short memory." - Doug larson1718. Dormition is the mother of all failures.1719. Criminal lawyer - redundant phrase.1720. Welcome to hell. Here is your copy of windows me.1721. No life is wasted, it's always nice to set a bad example.1722. A nuisance, with such a future it turns into the present.1723. "Stupidity, if left untreated, self-corrects." - Heinlein1724. The stock market always does what you think, but rarely does.1725. Optimist: someone without much experience.1726. Hey santa, how much is your list of naughty girls worth?1727. "Of two evils, always choose the one you haven't tried." - Mae west1728. 99% of lawyers spoil the reputation of the rest.1729. There are two types of people - those who divide the citizen into two types, and those who do not.1730. There are several types of people - those who know how to have and those who do not always know how.1731. Any other girl does not die a virgin, ruins everyone's life.1732. If you lend someone twenty bucks and never find a foreigner like him again, it might have been worth it.1733. Don't be irreplaceable. If you cannot be replaced, you cannot be promoted.1734. Send lawyers, weapons and income!1735. No longer interrupt your enemy while he makes a mistake.1736. The attempt failed with honors.1737. "Under no circumstances lie in vain when the truth will fit." - Jack clancy1738. Everyone leaves the world a little better - some of them leave.1739. "I know i'm paranoid, but am i pretty paranoid?" - Tom clancy1740. We provide jesus - he was behind the sofa all this time.1741. Atheists let you do whatever you want.1742. “I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they all get nervous and give wrong answers.” - Peter kay1743. You are only young once, but you have the opportunity to remain immature forever.1744. Be good, and if you can't be the best, be careful.1745. The ability to quote is a useful substitute for wit.1746.The chances of a piece of bread falling buttered side down are directly proportional to the value of the carpet.1747. The master had never before seen such a model as yours.1748. Everyone has a scheme to get rich, which won't work.1749. "Friends can come and go, and enemies can pile up." - Thomas jones1750. If it seems like the different moves are right, you obviously don't understand what the hell is going on.1751. Smith